Mission District

Sunday Street Wedding

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Neighborhood icon and flashdance bike party tricycle boombox merrymaker Deep and his delightful girlfriend Kim got hitched yesterday smack-dab in the heart of Sunday Streets, quite possibly the most fitting venue for a man so closely associated with transportation quirkiness and the cycling community.  And despite the cloud cover and damp air, the chorus of ringing bike bells and love and sincerity was enough to light up every passersby's afternoon.

There was hardly a dry-eye in the entire place:

Tree Swing Assassin Finds New Target

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Back in January, this escaped nursing home patient cut down the beloved Valencia Street tree swing with a box cutter, only to call the cops on herself when an angry mob of joy defenders confronted her.  The situation was not resolved by sending her back to the bingo board, but rather SFPD let her free at the scene, citing an unfamiliarity with tree swing laws.

Now, nearly 8 months later, she's back on Valencia, brandishing her sharp knife and dull personality, cutting down fliers, scrapping stickers, and damaging government property.

The two hour rampage, in which she slowly made her way from 17th to 14th, reached a fever pitch when a bystander phoned up SFPD to have her hauled off.  However, the officer, not really sure what to make of the concerned citizen stand-off, briefly tried to get her to stop as she kept working the box cutter mere feet from the officer.  He then began lecturing her on what was okay to remove (graffiti) and not okay (city decals, signage posted by SFPD, pretty much everything) and I got outta there before shots were fired.

If anyone knows how to get a hold of her caretaker, please do.

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Photos of the Mission's Gritty Past

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Workers paving a dirt and gravel Mission Street (at 18th), Dec. 1910

As we mentioned in last week's post about what Bi-Rite looked like in 1947, the SF Public Library is right in the middle of scanning a bunch of ancient Mission District photography and posting it online for the benefit of late-night nerding out.  And lucky for us, library photo curator Christina Moretta dumped a fresh batch of previously unseen photos on Flickr on Tuesday.

Let's dig in:

Potereo and 25th, looking south towards a very-much under-developed Bernal Heights and future concrete nest of highway on and off-ramps.  To the right is the Potrero Ave. Saloon and Boarding House, advertising Hibernia Steam and Gibbons Whiskey in the windows. (You can catch another view of the bar here.)

Hashagans Cocktails on Mission at 25th, photographed in 1956…

…which you might recognize now as La Taqueria.

Carl's Pastry Shop at the corner of 18th and Guerrero in 1947, now home to Tartine.

A milk shake and sandwich joint at the corner of 18th and Dolores, also photographed in 1947…

…which is the current home to Dolores Park Cafe (from the looks of it, they still have the same tiles beneath their windows).

A whole bunch of the photos uploaded were of car crashes, which I guess were quite the social occasion back in the day.  Here we see some rust bucket flipped on 24th and Bryant, looking towards Potrero Hill.  “The Milk Shake King” is prominently placed on the corner, with the Roosevelt Tamale Parlor vying for attention mid-block.  But what's this?

Pop's, everyone's favorite urine-scented air hockey and dollar High Life dive, is smack-dab in the middle of the block.  Which means, at some point, someone thought it wise to toss that old neon sign in the trash and re-open the bar down the block.  Weird.

Anyway, here's another car that took a tumble.  The one at Folsom and Army in 1942, looking towards a still largely undeveloped Bernal Heights.

#MUNIfail, 1942-style (this one's at 23rd and Mission, with the present-day Walgreen's on the right).

And, of course, some things never change.

[Should you feel so inclined, you can check out the rest of the dump on the SF Public Library's Flickr]

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Blue Bottle Takes Another Stab at Opening in the Mission

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

After 2010's controversial and ultimately unsuccessful attempt at opening a Blue Bottle in Dolores Park, the ever hot SF coffee chain is fixing to open a cafe next week at the corner of 18th and Alabama, inside the Heath Ceramics factory.  Assuredly welcome news to all the folks who live and work out in the boonies of the Inner Mission, who no longer have to walk all the way to Valencia for a fix.

(Also, the factory itself, which is in the process of opening now, is of interest.  As dvtdl? points out, “not only are they bringing manufacturing jobs to the area, but they are also opening four artist studio spaces, an event space, [and] a shop.”)

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

The Birth of the Mission

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Revolution Cafe replaced that old haphazardly painted community mural with a new piece detailing the “birth of the Mission,” featuring a pair of Native Americans, Mission Dolores, Cesar Chavez, and some tripped out fog.  I'm sort of surprised that they left out a silhouette of a gold prospector riding a taco, but I suppose they ran out of room.

Impolite "Modern Asian Urban" Restaurant Coming Soon to Valencia

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

“Didn't your mother teach you it's rude to point?”

“Modern Asian Urban,” or MAU (which, shockingly, isn't a fancy new acronym for the ethnic yuppie), recently posted up their remarkably Westfield Mall Food Court-y signage in the old NY Buffalo Wings space.  At first glance, we're not sure what the make of the place: it's being run by a former Slow Club chef, so that's probably a good thing.  And it's not like anyone ever ate at the wings place.

However, that name is criminally obnoxious—never mind that someone in the city is making a wicked Chairman Mao pun.  Also, they're claiming the restaurant will be kid-friendly.  We hate kids.

Anyway, they're supposedly opening in the coming weeks with a mess of $15 rice bowls and noodles, so get ready.

(Oh, and you can follow 'em on Twitter, too.)

They're Ruining Jack's Karaoke

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

I realize Jack's lost DJ Purple, which is about as devastating as losing Buster Posey in May, but I can't help but think the bar is intentionally trying to fuck up the magic that was Karaoke Thursdays.  The lights were so bright that I got confused and thought I was drinking in the hospital.  And their famed mini-pitchers of Busch?  No more.  It's only overpriced beer in plastic cups from here on out.

On the bright side, it was deader than a doornail in there.  You could get up as much as you wanted.

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Cornhole!

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

We've been hearing rumors that everyone's favorite dive-themed bar Dr. Teeth had set-up a cornhole pitch on their patio, but never made it back there to see for ourselves.  And what a mistake that was.

They've got a nice terraced astroturf lawn for you to spill your drink on, two boards, and a whole bunch of bean bags to whip at your friends when they aren't looking.  It's all the fun that you come to expect with southern lawn games, without having to make friends with the randoms who bring cornhole to Dolores Park.  Plus, you get to play while sucking down PBR tallboys and feasting on a plate of sweet potato tater tots.  That is to say, it's pretty much the perfect way to spend daylight hours at a bar.

(If you're curious, Alissa effortlessly whooped my ass two games to one.  I'm not much into losing, so I guess I'm not much into cornhole.)

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

This Must Be The Place: A Weekend-Long Festival of Post-Punk Documentaries

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

This weekend, our pals over at The Roxie are showing their truly massive compilation of obscure films and documentaries shot during the rise of post-punk. It's a solid chance to check out some rare footage from one of rock's most interesting eras. And on Saturday night, they're showcasing films on San Francisco's post-punk scene—something we don't usually hear too much about. Imagine, an evening focused on historical SF art and culture that doesn't revolve around Haight Street or Beat poets.

Maximumrocknroll caught up with The Roxie's Mike Keegan for a bit of background into the show:

I watch a tremendous amount of rock documentaries, and I am more or less enthralled by even the weakest entries in the genre. One of the major bummers of the world of rock docs, however – especially in the light of the proliferation of hastily put-together docs about baby boomer and post-baby boomer bands – is the default cinematic language that’s codified around them. That is: rad archival footage cut woefully short by contemporary interviews with participants contextualizing and excusing away bad behavior and youthful exuberance from the comfortable armchair of middle age. To that, I say: fuck that weak noise, let’s see what they meant when they said it.

If you want to check it out for yourself, we're giving away a pair of weekend passes to someone who likes this post on Facebook. (And if you don't want to chance it, you can go ahead and buy some tickets now.)

Finally, here's the preview for the show to hold you over until Friday:

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