Politics

John Avalos's Twitter Account Hacked By People Who Think John Avalos's Supporters Could Stand to Lose A Few Pounds

Earlier this morning, former mayoral candidate and current San Francisco Supervisor John Avalos's Twitter account was phished by an elite team of weight-conscious hackers.  In a probably not exclusive DM to Uptown Almanac, Avalos's hackers asked if we saw this pic of us, noting the picture was pretty “lol”.  They then went on to imply all Avalos's fans and followers were fat, suggesting we look into “the fastest ways to lose body fat in 2 weeks” (corrected for grammar).  Bummer, dude.

Mayor Lee Asks Mission Bars to Not Serve 'Heavy' Booze During Super Bowl

In an effort to cut down on the undeniably uncool vandalism that followed the Giants' crushing World Series victory, Mayor Ed Lee is 'going after booze' instead of 'tackling the culture of violence' that surrounds celebratory rioting.  The Chronicle fills us in:

The mayor said [last] Thursday that [this] week he and Police Chief Greg Suhr will tour neighborhoods hit by vandalism after the World Series and during Occupy Wall Street protests last year to offer support to business owners and “also to suggest that they serve something (other) than heavy alcohol during times of celebration, because that inebriation sometimes doesn’t help with people who want to maybe go beyond the bounds of acceptability in their celebration.”

In other words, take the booze out of the bro, maybe the bro won't torch your neighbor's compost bin outside of West of Pecos.

However, opt-in from local bars is purely voluntary, suggesting shots will be served well into hour three of Telecopter 4's continuous chaos coverage.  Or, as Adam DeMezza of 16th Street's Giordano Bro's pragmatically told the Chronicle, “it’s a good idea, but it’s going to be a tough sell.”

Tough sell, no doubt.  Considering every bar in the neighborhood will be packed full of folks feverishly drinking away shitty 2 Broke Girls commercials hours before kick-off, these places stand to lose lots of money by cutting-off their supply.  But this is the same strategy used by the city in 2007 when they were looking to dial back the whimsy (and, uhh, shootings) of Castro Halloween, and that effort saw empty streets and all but one bar closed.

Besides, it's good for business:

Lee noted that it was particularly important to keep the celebrations safe and respectful given that the San Francisco 49ers are making a bid to host the 2016 Super Bowl. That game would be played at the team's planned new Santa Clara stadium, however, and not in San Francisco.

So have a sober Sunday, folks. For Santa Clara.

[SFgate/SF Appeal, via KQED]

Here's Ed Lee Getting Sneezed On at the Obama Inauguration

While Barack Obama was declaring an end to perpetual war and doubling down on gay marriage, San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee was getting ready to bring the flu back to SF while perched up in the bleachers.  Adorable, really.

Should you wish to play your own game of Inaugural Where's Waldo, you can find Ed in the top left, five seats in.

 

No Comment Campos Tackles the Valencia Restaurant Moratorium

Photo: Maren Caruso/Modern Luxury

My absolute favorite column on Mission Local is their “Weekly 'Conversation With Campos.'”  Each and every week, the staff at Mission Local comes up with a smart series of questions about the civil and political issues that impact our neighborhood and serves them up our Bold and Visionary Leader, Supervisor David Campos.

But there's a twist! Instead of answering the questions in any meaningful way, Campos finds new and inventive ways to say “I don't know” and “maybe.” Whether it's supporting a recall Sheriff Ross Mirkarimi (A: “Maybe”), why 16th and Mission is so disgusting (A: “I don't know, not enough trash cans?”), or if he supports Lyft/SideCar/Uber and other taxi apps (A: “I don't know, but there's an app for gays!”), Campos consistently illustrates how shamefully out of touch and passionately indecisive our city's progressives have become.

This week's bummer Q&A dodges the issue of putting a temporary ban on new restaurants along Valencia, an issue that has struck a real nerve with the community since the Valencia Corridor Merchants Association voted in favor of the 1-year moratorium four weeks ago:

ML: Similarly, there are concerns by merchants in the Valencia Street corridor about future incoming businesses on the street. Some are asking for a moratorium. Would you support one?

DC: [In reference to The Examiner article that ran this morning], The Examiner article raises a larger issue. And that’s what we are focusing on. We’re working with Supervisor Scott Wiener’s office because Valencia Street basically is shared by two supervisors. One [part] is District 9 and one is District 8. Whatever we do, we do it collectively, something that makes sense for both districts.

Some of things that have been raised, that we’ve been looking at including, are raised by some merchants. Some merchants in that corridor have asked for a moratorium. We are in discussion in my office and with Supervisor Wiener’s office about that, trying to figure out if that’s appropriate.

ML: Does the Merchant’s Association support a moratorium?

DC: To be honest, I don’t want to speak for them. That might be their position. Those conversations just started. There are merchants on Valencia Street that are saying we should have a restaurant moratorium.

ML: Would the moratorium apply to all business on Valencia Street? What is your opinion?

DC: [It would be for] restaurants only.

I haven’t taken a position yet. I would like to see what they have to say. I want to see where Supervisor Wiener is on this. Both are positions right now that we are open to what people have to say.

I don't want to speak for the Merchant's Association either, but they have been on the record for a month now having voted in favor of a 1-year moratorium followed by a Special Use Permitting process for future restaurants, requiring new establishments to receive community support.  But I understand why you wouldn't know that, despite it having been reported on The Huffington Post, a litany of food blogs, and even Mission Local.

Anyway, your swift and decisive action is appreciated, as always.

[Mission Local]

Supes: Harvey Milk Remembrance Ceremony "Like a Warm Bath"

Supervisors Campos, Olague, and Wiener.

San Francisco's Bored of Former Supervisors remain alive, barely, after this evening's apparently riveting memorial service for 34th anniversary of Harvey Milk and Mayor Moscone's assassination. And while we can't completely fault our city leaders for experiencing 7th grade math class flashbacks during what we're told was a “painful” crop of speeches, considering the amount of posturing they do, you'd think they'd be good at it.

[Photo by Patrick Connors]

Take Mushrooms and Celebrate Thanksgiving With Nutbags, Conspiracy, and Political Assassination!

I know you're hella bummed you can't be back home chatting it up with your crazy Uncle Jimmy who has proof that Obama is a Kenyan reptilian sent to subjugate the human race, but the Roxie will do you one better.  Today (Thanksgiving!), The Roxie is putting on an evening-long tribute to the 49rd anniversary of JFK's assassination with a special screening of Oliver Stone's JFK and a host of character witnesses and experts discussing the killing. Some of the highlights include:

James H. Fetzer - A former Marine Corps officer who served at the same Recruit Depot and Rifle Range where Lee Oswald took his training, has become one of the leading authorities on the death of JFK in the world today. He has published three collections of studies by experts—ASSASSINATION SCIENCE (1998), MURDER IN DEALEY PLAZA (2000), and THE GREAT ZAPRUDER FILM HOAX (2003)—which the foremost proponent of the theory that “Oswald did it!”, Vincent Bugliosi, has described as “the only exclusively scientific books ever published on the assassination”. He is the only scholar who has given lectures on the conspiracy behind JFK's death at Cambridge, Harvard and Yale.

Fetzer could also be described as a “total nutbag” whose other beliefs include (1) the George W. Bush administration was, at least, partially responsible for 9/11, (2) Senator Paul Wellstone was assassinated by a “sophisticated electromagnetic pulse weapon,” “probably at the behest of the Bush administration,” and (3) “the CIA, the American Mafia, anti-Castro Cubans, Texas oilmen, the 'military–industrial complex', as well as Lyndon B. Johnson, Richard Nixon, and J. Edgar Hoover, all may have been involved in a plot to kill [President Kennedy].”

Also fun!:

Judyth Vary Baker - Judyth Vary Baker was Lee Harvey Oswald's girlfriend at the time of the Kennedy Assassination. During their 5-month relationship Judyth was introduced to key players in Lee Harvey Oswald's world, all of whom would ultimately present themselves to be involved in the assassination in one way or another. In 1991, Judyth finally broke her years-long silence on her relationship with Oswald, divulging intimate details about David Ferrie, Jack Ruby and Guy Bannister (all of whom are depicted in Oliver Stone's JFK). Judyth's story was featured in Nigel Turner's comprehensive 8-part documentary,The Men Who Killed Kennedy. In 2011, Judyth published her story in a book titled: Me and Lee: How I came to know, love and lose Lee Harvey Oswald. Due to threats made on her life, Judyth presently lives in Europe. Her appearance at the Roxie theater will be a rare and wonderful occasion to hear her accounts first-hand. Judyth will also be signing copies of her book at this event.

There's also some guys who have been featured on Fox News and Alex Jones' Infowars, so you know this is going to be an absolute clusterfuck of comedy.

Get your tickets now! I wish I could be there! (And here's the full schedule:)

4:00PM Doors Open
4:45PM Introductions
4:50PM Dr. Paul Kangas
5:15PM Kris Millegan
5:25PM Screening of Oliver Stone's JFK
8:30PM James H. Fetzer, Ph.D.
9:00PM Saint John Hunt
9:30PM Judyth Vary Baker
10:30PM Questions and Answers

(Fun side note!: when searching Google Images for photos of the “JFK Assassination”, a mess of headshots of Rebecca Black come up.  Maybe it's because she looks like a weird version of Jackie Kennedy? Maybe it's because she did it?)

Then they came for the nudes…

I warned of the slippery, oiled-up slope we were on back in April. Now the city's verdict is clear: your genitals must be shamefully concealed from sight as G-d intended.

Put them away and think of the children for once!

Nudist's last stand, San Francisco 2012

[Photo]

London Breed Has A New Job – Thanks to Ross Mirkarimi!

Do you realize how much influence Sheriff Ross Mirkarimi has over San Francisco? It’s pretty incredible.

He not only helped revive Christina Olague’s campaign to get her elected to his former seat on the Board of Supervisors in District 5, but he also is the reason Christina Olague lost the election to claim his former seat on the Board of Supervisors in District 5.

The man is truly omnipotent. His troubled marriage affected Olague’s future and helped send London Breed to City Hall!

There could be another explanation, though.

It is possible that Ms. Breed ran a better campaign; that Breed has deep roots in the district, as well as experience working with the community and had access to an assload of campaign cash. There is no reason to think that Breed couldn’t be the conscious choice of her neighbors without regard to the woes of Mirkarimi, is there?

Maybe.

The woman that Breed was running to replace, Christina Olague, was not exactly a dynamic political candidate. Something was missing from Olague’s demeanor on the campaign trail – like passion, enthusiasm, charisma…a pulse.

Most of the time Ms. Olague exuded the energy level of Terri Schaivo on Quaaludes.

A closer look at the ranked choice results shows Breed with an early advantage that continued to build as votes for so-called progressive candidates were scattered repeatedly in round after round of elimination.

Don’t forget – poll results released in September had Olague in the lead with a paltry 13% favorable response, which is a strong indication that she was not headed for a clear-cut victory.

But none of that (good, bad or ridiculous) is half as interesting as making EVERYTHING that happens in San Francisco relate back to Ross Mirkarimi.

Eric Mar won his election this week because he voted to fire Sheriff Mirkarimi.

Why not claim that Muni buses were set on fire following the SF Giants World Series victory because Ross Mirkarimi was allowed to remain Sheriff?

After all, we do know that plastic bags are banned because of Mirkarimi.

Would it be a stretch to say that Dianne Feinstein’s hair is still jet-black at the age of 79 because of the nefarious deeds of ROSS MIRKARIMI??

What would we do without him?

Meet Dolores Park's Only Republican

Much to our surprise, Mission Local could only fine one Republican in a park famous for its access to weed snacks.  So who is this Republican?  Someone from outside the neighborhood who supports Prop 37 and thinks knows Monsanto is part of the “evil empire.”

[via Mission Local]

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