Movies

Rad Cinecave Shirts Now Up For Sale

The shirt suggests Cinecave has goblins on the stairs and bats hanging from the ceiling and confused-looking men emerging from the screen.  Scary stuff.  Should be a hit!

(Then again, the shop doesn't have a gate for a door nor a crooked and ghoul-ish 17 Reasons Why-reminiscening sign on the roof, so maybe the artist took some liberty in depicting the scene in the basement.)

[Pic by WBTC]

Lost Weekend Video's New Underground Micro-Cinema "Cinecave" Opens Tonight

So says the SF Bay Guardian:

Exciting news rumbling from beneath Valencia Street's staunchly independent Lost Weekend Video: the micro-theater Cinecave is opening this week with events Thu/29 and Fri/30, after an awesomely successful Kickstarter campaign. The 25-seat screening room, available for members of Lost Weekend's Cineclub (join at the store), boasts real movie theater seats, a brand-new screen, and kickin' sound system.

They have a bunch of cool-sounding stuff planned, including a monthy video-series from the “Midnites for Maniacs” folks.  Plus, they'll be showing a bunch of “lost” films you cannot find on DVD, be shown in a traditional theater, or even rent from the store itself.  So look out for all that.

(And should you care to learn more, SFBG has a bunch more info on the cave.)

FEMA Filming Disaster Preparedness Commercial At... La Taqueria?

I have no idea why FEMA picked La Taqueria as the setting for their new commercial… maybe because in the event of an earthquake, we shouldn't eat rice on our burritos?  Or the foil that's used to wrap our dinner also makes a fantastic hat?

Either way, fancy Hollywood types that I've never seen before in my life are circling the corner of 25th and Mission today.

How a Bicycle is Made (in 1945)

This video is kinda old and kinda long (and so fuckin' British), but if you have a little time to squander, this look into how Raleigh bikes were manufactured and designed in 1945 is pretty neat-o.  For example:

This lady can install a tire in under 50 seconds.

This is the giant Raleigh factory.

The meth lab in the back of the factory.

Duder apparently fills 1,000 hubs with ball bearings every goddamn day.

I’d like to know how you turn all these lines and circles on paper into a finished bicycle.” - An Actual British Person

Win Tickets to a Movie About German Kids Mainlining Heroin While Listening to David Bowie!

Our friends at The Roxie have a “teen-girls-gone-wild double-feature” going down this Friday, featuring the ultra-low-budget punk flick Desperate Teenage Lovedolls and the mega-uplifting skin-popper Christiane F., whose description follows:

It's the mid-1970s in West Berlin. You're a 14 year old girl living in a depressing high rise with your single mom. You sneak into clubs, listen to a lot of David Bowie and fall in with the wrong crowd. Soon you're hooked on heroin, your boyfriend's a hustler and you're walking the streets to feed your habit. Holy sheisse! Released to critical acclaim and with severe backlash from the West German government, this harrowing tale of youth gone wrong became an international cult classic as well as the standard anti-drug film shown in German schools. Based on actual events, Christiane F. stems from a series of articles published in Stern magazine that featured interviews with the real Christiane F. (Christiane Felscherinow). An early work by directed by Uli Edel (of The Baader Meinhof Complex fame) it offers a down and dirty glimpse into the lives the drug denizens that populated Berlin's Zoo Station at that time and includes a memorable concert scene with David Bowie.

If that sounds like your idea of a fun childhood/Friday night, like the relevant post about this contest on our Facebook page and, on Friday morning, we'll select someone at random to get a pair of complimentary tickets.  Or go ahead and just buy your tickets now.

New Mission Theater to Become Five-Screen Cinema that Serves Beer? (!!!)

Grub Street brings us the best news we've heard all year:

Alas, we're finally getting word of developer and Medjool owner Gus Murad's plans for the historic New Mission Theater, via the Historic Preservation Commission's agenda for this week. The main item up for discussion at tomorrow's meeting — besides the fight to get some sort of landmark designation for endangered Gold Dust Lounge — is a proposal to convert the single-screen cinema to a five-screen one, with Texas-based Alamo Drafthouse Cinema as the operator. With locations already in Houston, Austin, San Antonio, Denver, and D.C., Alamo has been voted the number-one movie theater in the country by Entertainment Weekly, largely due to their beer and food service, and their policy against playing advertisements before shows.

The proposal calls for the first-floor projection room to become a bar, with the main auditorium space getting restored as a large screening room. Additionally, there would be four more auditoriums built into what was the lower and upper balconies of the theater. Also, obviously, they would restore the iconic, Art Deco, 70-foot neon sign on Mission Street.

As Grub Street goes on to point out, Murad has not had the easiest time getting projects through the city in the past (there was that two year long fight about the Medjool roof deck, and the Historic Preservation Commission hasn't been that receptive to remodeling New Mission in the past).  And it was only a year ago that it was rumored a bowling alley would move in to New Mission, only for that project to go nowhere. But let's hope this all works out, because even an 'independent' chain that wants to bring us beer, food, and cinema without making us go to the Fillmore would be welcome… so long as it doesn't drive The Roxie out of business.

[Photo by Anomalous_A]

Watch a Bunch of San Francisco Bike Smut This Weekend!

There's nothing San Franciscans love more than sanctifying bicycles and celebrating our sexual enlightenment.  Now you can do both!

So what is “Bike Smut” exactly?  Here's a couple of handy, shockingly safe-for-work GIFs to help paint the picture:

You can browse around their tumblr for more bisexual bicycle intercourse that may or may not get you fired from your job, or just hold out for Saturday's screening (and keep your fingers crossed for some bizarre rear triangle scissoring).

Epic Beard Man: The Movie

Remember Epic Beard Man? Something like 20 internet years ago, some old dude in an I AM A MOTHERFUCKER t-shirt manhandled a guy on AC Transit and the internet blew the most epic load over its collective keyboard.

Well, the bloodthirsty vampires of Hollywood caught the scent of money in the wind and are turning the Best Thing Ever to Happen to AC Transit into a movie… starring Danny Trejo(???).  Just read the official plot synopsis for “Bad Ass”:

Decorated Vietnam hero Frank Vega returns home only to get shunned by society leaving him without a job or his high school sweetheart. It’s not until forty years later when an incident on a commuter bus (where he protects an elderly black man from a pair of skin heads) makes him a local hero where he’s suddenly celebrated once again. But his good fortune suddenly turns for the worse when his best friend Klondike is murdered and the police aren’t doing anything about it.

And the trailer:

I have a bunch of questions about this. Did they think calling the movie “Bad Ass” would be somehow better than just calling it “I AM A MOTHERFUCKER”? Did they change history so a white man is protecting an elderly black man instead of brutalizing him to keep the /b/tards from totally nutting all over this? Did they pay the original Epic Beard Man, who's now homeless, a dime of royalties for the movie rights? And most importantly, do I even care?

Anyway, the film has no release date and co-stars what's-his-face from Sons of Anarchy, so yeah, this will probably rule.

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