Movies

Contest: Nick Offerman Live at the Roxie (And He Has a New Movie Too)

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Nick Offerman is perhaps better known as Ron Swanson, or maybe “that guy who plays Ron Swanson on Parks & Rec.”  It's undeniable that he's become this generation's Michael Richards.  But despite the wake of 9 seasons of Cosmo Kramer leaving Richard with a grip of mediocre failures that ultimately cumulated with a racist breakdown, we're optimistic that Offerman won't see the same fate.

Take the above trailer for Somebody Up There Likes Me.  Sure, it's suffering from a serious case of indieitis, but it's funny.  At the very least, it shows promise. And that gives us hope that there's life after Ron Swanson for one of our favorite cult actors.

Fortunately for us, The Roxie will be showing the movie starting Friday, and Nick Offerman will be at the theater all day Saturday doing an audience Q+A. That's right, you can be in the same dark room as Nick Offerman for multiple hours Saturday night.  Swoon.

As a bonus, the folks over at The Roxie want to give away a pair of tickets to see Nick and the movie.  To win them, give us your best definition of “indieitis” (or give us the best reason why that's the worst made up word in the history of made up words) in the comments by 5pm Friday.  Be sure to use your real email so we have a way to get a hold of you.

[Roxie]

New "Gangnam Style, Swagger Style" Alamo Drafthouse and Condo Project Approved

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

If you happened to tune into yesterday's Planning Commission meeting on SFGovTV (you didn't), you were treated to a delightful chorus of goofy neighborhood old-timers reminiscing about first kisses in the back-rows and sneaking past ushers at the New Mission Theater.  And those nostalgic stories prompted the Commission to go ahead and approve, as Planning Commissioner Kathrin Moore awkwardly and hilariously called it, the “Gangnam style, swagger style” condo and theater renovation project at 22nd and Mission.

This, without the slightest hint of hyperbole, is the best thing ever, as we're now getting a brand-spankin'-new 5-screen, 348-seat, beer and food-serving Alamo Drafthouse.  They're even looking to install a valet bike parking station in the lobby for 40+ bikes!

Construction is slated to begin as early as this summer, with an expected completion date of who-the-fuck-knows.

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

John Waters on the Roxie: "You Can Masturbate in the Theater"

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Among many other fine compliments, he even endorses fucking fellow ticket-buyer in the place.

(Oh, and this video is plugging the Roxie's current fundraiser (which UA will be helping raise money for at our Holiday Comedy Show on 12/18), which aims to raise $60k to help expand the theater's programming and be even more awesome.)

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

The Mission Has A Lot to Look Forward to With Alamo Drafthouse

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

First, this is going to be the third time I source something from “popular real estate blog” SocketSite within a few weeks.  Normally I hate real estate blogs and cannot manage to read past the first word of any given post (not including Curbed, of course), but now I'm reading one at 8pm on a Wednesday night?  I'm concerned the aging process is affecting me.

Second, popular real estate blog SocketSite has been going big with their coverage of the New Mission Theater/Alamo Drafthouse project lately.  I don't know a whole lot about Alamo Drafthouse, other than the beer and movies thing and being down with both of those, so this comment on SocketSite from veteran Mission-come-Austin resident Bob has me even more pysched than I was already:

This is terrific news. Nobody should worry and fear the word multiplex. I've lived in the Mission for 29 years, BUT I have had to live/work in Austin on and off for the past two years. I hate Austin, frankly, and miss the Mish, but the one bright point has been that Austin is a killer film town. Mostly due to the Alamo Drafthouse…

The Austin theaters really do cinema very well. The Alamo Drafthouse is a great place to watch films. Great bar, great food, you can relax and watch the film, eat, get waited on, and they take cinema seriously. They show great old classics, plus all the best independents.

This is a dream come true for that theater on Mission, and for Mission Street, which keeps getting better and better. Folks in our area have been dreaming to rescue that place for years. The Sundance Cinema tried to do something like this business model over at the Kabuki, but the results haven't been as great. They don't have good taste. The Alamo people have good taste.

Bob goes on to talk about gentrification and the neighborhood being too expensive for college grads, concluding we're better off despite all that.  But who cares about all that activisty rigmarole right now—The Alamo people have good taste.

(And now that I've admitted the aging process is affecting me, I'm going to go listen to that Hey Ya! song or something.)

[SocketSite]

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Update on the New Mission Theater Alamo Drafthouse Project

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Fox News's highbrow print edition takes a look at what we can expect:

Under the current plans, the main three-tiered auditorium will be kept partially intact as the biggest venue with 348 seats. The theater's two upper balconies will be turned into four smaller theaters, with an extension added to the main balcony suspended over the auditorium. The five-screen venue will have a total of 556 seats, with some of the smaller venues seating 36 to 46 people, according to the plans filed with the city.

“Restoring it to its original glory is ideal, but then you're left with an 1,800-seat, single-screen movie theater,” [Tim League, founder of Alamo Drafthouse] says. “It doesn't work.”

…One area at risk is the original brick building, later turned into the lobby. Its walls were once graced with silver-leaf murals from the 1932 remodeling, but some may be lost when this area is seismically reinforced and reconstructed. Alamo plans to try to salvage some of the Deco murals.

Sadly, Alamo has to wait until Dec. 5th for a Historic Preservation Commission meeting before they can get the project rolling (and even then, cranky neighbors can further delay things), so the soonest we'll be seeing the theater open is December 2013.  But still, beer and movies!

[WSJ]

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Tommy Wiseau Found in Local Whole Foods

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Sam ran into the writer/director/star of the best/worst movie ever set in San Francisco grazing in a Whole Foods bulk isle, noting:

“He insisted on taking his hair out of a ponytail before taking the photo.  He smelled of heavenly Aqua Velva.”

Anyway, no word on why he's back in town (sequel?!), but this is certainly the most exciting celebrity sighting this town has had in weeks.

(And if you're not hip to the cinematic trainwreck that is The Room, here's a taste:)

Woody Allen to Film in the Mission Through Next Week, Parking Will Be a Bitch

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Following up on the news that Woody Allen took over the corner of 14th and South Van Ness earlier today, Matt Graves shares the filming notice being circulated around the Mission this morning.  They'll be on 20th between Valencia and Mission, Lexington between 19th and 21st, and San Carlos near 20th through Wednesday next week.  They've also blocked off most of Capp between 19th and 20th for trailers.

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Woody Watch: Woody 'Pops-Up' at 14th and South Van Ness

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Early riser Zach Perkins just texted in the following report: “Woody Allen fuckin' up my commute.  S Van Ness and 14th.  Block of 14 east of SVN totally closed.”

Screw cars, Woody's filming in the Mission!

Update: Because this is the most exciting thing to happen to the Mission since Dear Mom opened, I grabbed my inhaler and headed over there a little while ago.

The crew was pretty good at letting the villagers get up good and close to take photos, and Allen was even overheard complimenting a few bicycles.  Cate Blanchett and a bunch of other Oscar winners no one cares about were on hand for the scene outside New Central Cafe, in which Cate got out of a taxi with a million suitcases, waited outside an apartment for a person to answer, only to head into the cafe rejected.

Cate's seems to be playing the lead role of a wealthy New York woman who finds herself going broke and moving to San Francisco to stay with her sister, presumably in that very apartment above 14th and South Van Ness.

Crew members on the scene said they'd be filming in the Mission the rest of the day.

Some additional shots:

Here's Woody just staring at the ground during a take.

Finally, this Municyclist was a more interesting sight for one passing cyclist.

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Woody Allen's Latest Film Starring Louis C.K. and Alec Baldwin to be Set in the Mission

— By Erika Kali |

AND HE'S PUMPED!

With the recent Woody Allen sightings in the Mission, it's no surprise to hear that he's in town filming a new movie, titled for now as the “Woody Allen Summer Project”. According to the San Jose Mercury News (and why only a San Jose outfit is reporting the news and not one in San Francisco is beyond me), the movie will be shot in a few choice neighborhoods in San Francisco and Marin:

The film crew and cast — which is rumored to include Cate Blanchett, Alec Baldwin, Peter Sarsgaard and comedian Louis C.K. — will be set in the Mission, the avenues in the western end of San Francisco, the Marina District and parts of Marin County, according to the commission

The movie is supposedly about some wealthy lady from New York that goes broke and moves to San Francisco to rediscover her purpose in life, fall in love and be quirky. I'm assuming she decided to move to San Francisco because she heard about all the affordable housing in the area and the spacious nature of said “apartments”. What we're most excited about is that we all get to shovel tacos and Tecate in our faces while trying to jump into the background of a Woody Allen film. That and maybe happening upon Louis C.K. looking really, really bummed.

[Pic via Mission Mission]

This Must Be The Place: A Weekend-Long Festival of Post-Punk Documentaries

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

This weekend, our pals over at The Roxie are showing their truly massive compilation of obscure films and documentaries shot during the rise of post-punk. It's a solid chance to check out some rare footage from one of rock's most interesting eras. And on Saturday night, they're showcasing films on San Francisco's post-punk scene—something we don't usually hear too much about. Imagine, an evening focused on historical SF art and culture that doesn't revolve around Haight Street or Beat poets.

Maximumrocknroll caught up with The Roxie's Mike Keegan for a bit of background into the show:

I watch a tremendous amount of rock documentaries, and I am more or less enthralled by even the weakest entries in the genre. One of the major bummers of the world of rock docs, however – especially in the light of the proliferation of hastily put-together docs about baby boomer and post-baby boomer bands – is the default cinematic language that’s codified around them. That is: rad archival footage cut woefully short by contemporary interviews with participants contextualizing and excusing away bad behavior and youthful exuberance from the comfortable armchair of middle age. To that, I say: fuck that weak noise, let’s see what they meant when they said it.

If you want to check it out for yourself, we're giving away a pair of weekend passes to someone who likes this post on Facebook. (And if you don't want to chance it, you can go ahead and buy some tickets now.)

Finally, here's the preview for the show to hold you over until Friday:

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