Capitalism

Blue Bottle, La Cocina, and the Commercialization of Dolores Park

The debate surrounding the commercialization of Dolores Park sure has been heating up lately.  Earlier this week, Stephen Elliot, the man largely responsible for preventing American Apparel from opening up shop on Valencia Street in 2009, took up the cause and launched “Stop the Trailer.”  Stephen easily has the capability to see some success on this issue given his network of businesses and track-record of victory.  He even has devoted himself to undermine Blue Bottle's business by standing in front of their trailer and offering free coffee to all their patrons.

The general campaign against these trailers makes many good points: Dolores Park is already used to its max, the trailers, generators and accompanying lines will be a visual and audible blight and, most importantly, parks are meant to be for leisure, sport and unfettered drinking.

However, Stephen and other neighbor's campaign is being subverted by Chicken John.  He defends his use of the “McDonald's is coming!“ hyperbole in his straw-man petition because it was successful, “time was short and we needed knee-jerk reactions. Which we got.”  He spends his time trying to paint local business Blue Bottle as a corporate monster, but completely ignores that La Cocina will be operating a similar truck, all while parading around Ritual Roaster's trailer on federal land.  Worst of all, Chicken John is a man with previously no visibility on park matters.  Of the half dozen or so community meetings I've been to over the past year, he never once showed his face or rallied his crew of Laughing Squid fanboys.  This guy doesn't care about “Dolores Park's soul;” he is, yet again, merely using this controversy as a tool for self-promotion.

Time is poorly spent defining what types of businesses should be allowed to vend on public land.  More importantly, it's hard to fault Blue Bottle or La Cocina for taking this offer—Rec. & Park truly offered an incredible deal.  As anyone who has ever tried to open a business in San Francisco can tell you, the costs and red tape are outstanding.  One small Valencia St. retail outlet (no food or drink) that I know of spent $60,000 just to open the door and dealt with countless setbacks (ADA compliance, fire etc).  Serving food and drink makes it even more costly.  Yet Blue Bottle has only sunk $25,000 into their venture and La Cocina has reportedly spent $30,000.  To be granted a retail space with access 1.2 million patrons a year for such a staggeringly low start-up cost and, worst, only $1,000/month in rent is what is so disgusting.  As Blue Bottle's James Freeman told 7x7 Magazine, “It was less expensive than building out a cafe.”

And this is the problem with the deal.  Rather than fill up one of the dozen storefronts on Valencia or Mission with a business, we have incentivized businesses to plant 12-foot trucks in the middle of a park that is already pressed for space.  Even if Blue Bottle or La Cocina had to get a Dolores location, the storefront on the corner of 18th and Dolores next to Bi-Rite Cremery is up for rent.  Rec & Park should have recognized that if they were going to whore out one of our national treasures, they should have at least demanded more money per month than what I pay in rent.

Given all this, I recognize booting the trucks out of Dolores Park is an unwinnable war.  The contracts are in place, the permits have been drawn up and the trucks have been built.  Short of Chicken John taking a liter of gas and a match to the trucks, they'll be in The Park later this fall.  But kicking them out is not a war worth pursuing: it would be unfair to for these two groups, who are largely innocent in the whole ordeal, to eat the cost of the city's blunder.  Instead, Rec & Park should realize this was a grave mistake and when the permits are up in two years, not renew them and have Rec & Park head Phil Ginsburg assure us that this will never happen again.

Breaking News: San Francisco Coffee Costs More Than Crack, Just as Addictive

 

          bro lets go splitsies on a sack of Brazil - Fazenda Cambara C.O.E.

          bro lets go splitsies on a sack of Brazil - Fazenda Cambara C.O.E.

I don't really get the whole coffee snobbery in San Francisco. When I lived on the East Coast all you needed was a cup from Dunkin' Donuts, and you were set. In San Francisco it seems like the coffee brand you drink really defines you, like saying you only drink Tecate because PBR was so 2006.  Consequently, I feel the heat of social stigmas when I bring up my unabashed excitement for the return of the Pumpkin Spice Latte in all of its Starbucks glory. It's the perfect fall accessory you guys!

Anyway, San Francisco seems to be supporting the coffee bean pushers by supplying the hipster youth at their Mecca with future plans of a Blue Bottle stand in Dolores Park. The following Ken Burns style mockumentary from the people of Killing My Lobster is a rare glimpse into the growing gang mentality of these coffee crackheads fueled by San Francisco's local coffee houses.

New owners of Pabst are spoiled East Coast douchebros; Kid Rock could have been PBR spokesman

Because the name 'Kid Rock' screams authenticity.

In the last month a grip of new info has popped up on the interwebs and shed new light on the bizzare branding machine behind Pabst Brewing; giving us a glimpse at what could have been and a taste of what's to come for the PBR brand.  As previously reported, Pabst Brewing was very recently acquired by brand-mogul/dread-pirate C. Dean Metropoulos for a cool $250 million.  Papa Metropoulos then gifted the company to his two sons, Evan and Daren, cause like all twenty-somethings these days they desperately needed a job. In my previous post, I questioned whether the change in ownership would cause PBR to 'go (even more) mainstream.'  If the recent article on Evan and Daren in Bloomberg Businessweek is any indication, the answer is a resounding yes.  

Let's get the character assassination out of the way first so we can move on to the more pressing matters at hand (like 'BAWITADBA!!! WHY IN THE FUCK IS THERE A PICTURE OF KID ROCK IN THIS POST???' My thoughts exactly, friend).  The Metropoulos Bros are some spoiled ass New England raised douchetards, who are about as far from both hipster and blue collar (the demographics that keep PBR profitable) as they could possibly be.  To start, the MetroBros met with Matt Schwartz of Bloomberg Businessweek in the 35th floor lounge of the Mandarin Orientel in Midtown Manhattan, where he remarked that the Bros “were very much at home.”  Schwartz goes on to mention that they had just come from a friend's wedding at Martha's Vineyard, MA, where the MetroBros had “summered since they were boys.”  

“Evan, 29, divides his time between Miami Beach, Los Angeles, and New York City. Daren, 27, lives in Los Angeles, in Hugh Hefner's old residence, a 7,300-square-foot English manor house he recently bought for $18 million.”

Daren & Evan Metropoulos hanging out with Katie Couric's mom in 2008, who later bestowed upon them the title of 'Dean's Soon'.

Via some Greek Matrix Trilogy fanzine.

Through the course of the interview, Evan, donning a green polo and gaudy chain necklaces, discusses his plans to sponsor rodeo riders to promote Lone Star beer in Texas; surfers to promote Primo in Hawaii; a plan to revive the defunct Star and Stripes beer as a military and veteran's beer, and other asinine strategies from Marketing 101 at the learning annex.  In discussing Star and Stripes, Evan goes as far as to suggest that drinkers of Bud Light are supporting foreigners TERRORISTS!

With the MetroBros new strategies, it doesn't seem far fetched that they could eventually take up Kid Rock on an offer he made several years prior: to be the celebrity spokesman of Pabst Blue Ribbon.  The nail in the coffin for PBR's (falsely) perceived 'authenticity' is already out there people, it's just question of whether or not the new owners will decide to use it.  The pair are already in the process of sponsoring Funny or Die produced sketches that will prominently feature PBR, after Evan approached Will Ferrel's company saying: “We want to win. We want to blow these brands out, explode them, and make everyone lots of money.”  

Possibly the one single redeeming plan the MetroBros may have for their company applies directly to their Colt 45 malt liquor brand.  According to the Business Weekly article, they are currently in negotiations with Snoop Dogg in developing a line of Colt 45 flavors.  FLAVORS PEOPLE.  

Expect Gin n Juice Colt 45 tallboys to hit a liquor store near you in 2012.  

JJ Abrams Presents ...yet another show about an Island; This time set in the San Francisco Bay

Will this show be an epic period-piece set in the gritty prison's golden age?  Or a Lost-meets-The Rock flavored travesty?

Deadline Hollywood reports that FOX, which last week gave a pre-green light commitment to Bad Robot's latest spec script, has today given the official go ahead to pilot the show.  After going through several re-writes, the final script for ALCATRAZ was penned by LOST exec-producer Elizabeth Sarnoff.  ALCATRAZ is described as “a show about mysteries, secrets and the most infamous prison of all time: Alcatraz.”  Sarnoff is attached as showrunner and will exec-produce along with Abrams and Bryan Burk. 

While not yet confirmed, I've heard from both some local union crew guys and some kids I know at networks down in LA, that the show will mostly be shot in Vancouver.  This is mostly to be expected, as it follows Bad Robot's current production model with FRINGE, which is supposed to be set in Boston (I think).  

So no, this won't be another TRAUMA.  But is that a good thing or a bad thing for our city?

And What Do 7x7 Readers Think About Blue Bottle Coming to Dolores Park?

Earlier this week I went to some lame community meeting about renovating Mecca and rather than talk about the renovations, NIMBY neighbors spent 90 minutes berating Rec. & Park about park minutia.  My favorite tirade was the 20 minutes wasted talking about Blue Bottle moving into Dolores Park, which the neighbors were (obviously) against.  Admittedly, I was sort of skeptical about having carts go into the park, but listening to these people makes me all for it (can we get a liquor store in there already?).  They complained about the outreach and not knowing about the carts going into the park (SF Weekly was posting stories about it in the Spring) and whining about the money being raised not being exclusively for the park (Rec. & Park confirmed that their accounting processes makes this impossible and they have to close their $12m budget deficit).  Neighbors are vowing to fight to get the permit revoked (two board members of Dolores Park Works even suggested that the stands be kicked out, even though they haven't even arrived yet).  Yeah, the privatization of SF Parks sucks, but crying to Rec. & Parks during an unrelated meeting isn't the way to go about it.  At least some people are thrilled.

Disney Coming to the Mission?

SF Weekly has some rumors that Disney Studios is trying to get ahold of the old 16th & Folsom Chocolate factory:

​Mission denizens received an odd, anonymous press release last week: “According to reputable sources, Disney Studios recently met with the SF Mayor's Office to plan its move to the former Hershey's Chocolate location at the corner of Folsom and 16th streets in the heart of SF's Mission District.” When we followed up, the author would only identify his or herself as an owner of the “property adjacent to the future Disney location at the corner of Folsom and 16th streets.”

Well, neither Disney Studios nor the mayor's office has gotten back to us. Mission District Supervisor David Campos hasn't heard a thing. But the property's real estate broker wouldn't deny the Disney rumor (though he said there are still no “signed commitments”) — and made the following none-too-veiled reference to a large, glove-wearing rodent.

SF Weekly goes on to ask if this is a “sign of the apocalypse,” but I'm not so sure this is a big deal.  For example, Kink.com is a few blocks down the road, yet the Mission isn't one giant bondage festival.  That said, the realtor told the Weekly: “I think they were drawn by the hip, cool, artistic vibe of the Mission, as opposed to some of the more sterile places they could go to that are probably cheaper, too.”  Maybe the next Hannah Montana will be a Mission alt?  That'd be awesome.

(link)

* Note: today's new picture of me wearing a Winnie the Pooh costume was purely coincidental.

Coupon Day (Thankfully) Gone Forever

The saintly students over at Mission Loc@l bring news that Rainbow Grocery has slaughtered coupon day dead. This is fantastic news for normal people who don't purchase $400+ dollars worth of multivitamins because now we get to shop there everyday of the year without waiting in 45 minute lines while our hot neighbor buys 20 pounds of bananas she'll never eat.  Before you go all Abbie Hoffman on Rainbow, you can get 10% off your purchases everyday just for having a pulse, so no need to FREAK THE FUCK OUT.

(photo via Mission Loc@l)

Blue Bottle Officially Coming to Dolores Park

The SF Examiner is reporting that Rec. & Park approved Blue Bottle's two year lease to sell wares in Dolo:

Blue Bottle LLC — which already attracts hundreds of coffee aficionados who wait in long lines at its Ferry Building, Hayes Valley, Mint Plaza and SFMOMA hot spots — was granted a lease to sell its organic and pesticide-free beans in the park.

The Recreation and Park Commission approved the lease at its regular meeting Thursday, with two revisions: It was cut from five years to two years, and the cart can’t be “smack dab’’ in the middle of the park.

The exact location and opening date of the stand is still unclear, hopefully they don't just plan the stand in the middle of the park.  What seems sketchy is the business narrative that is being injected in the park.  Now that “legitimate” businesses are permitted to sell in the park, what does this mean for the grassroots, DIY economy that we all now enjoy?  Will businesses setting up shop in the park start demanding a crackdown on kids selling cupcakes because it's unfair competition?

What bothers me most is that Dolores Park is a dependable good time without feeling like a fairground.  But with such a large marketable crowd, I guess this was bound to happen.

(Linkphoto by spencerhooks.  Hat tip InsideScoop)

All Billboard Ads Were Not Created Equal

During my evening commute back to SF I spotted this giant Levi's billboard from the freeway. I hadn't noticed it up earlier this week (aaaaand I'm pretty sure I would have) so I think it's pretty new.

Guess there aren't any Walt Whitman poems on par with Sir Mix a Lot.

I couldn't snap a pic while driving, but the billboard is basically a taller version of this.

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