Third Eye Blind

Semi Charmed Kind of Music Lessons

A friend noticed a bunch of these flyers hung up around the Financial District this week. 

This is certainly one way to get the attention of young professionals who grew up in the 90s and now have disposable income. The statement is also so crass that it goaded me into learning more about the double-threat marketing/musical genius behind it. 

So calling on all of my professional experience as a member of the Cyber Police, I successfully backtraced it to one Steve Dukes (via Googling the phone number.) Steve's list off accomplishments don't end with local legends Third Eye Blind. On one of his many personal websites, Steve first and foremost wants to make it absolutely clear that he “was John Cage's last student.”  The brilliance continues over at SteveDukes.us, which boasts that he's “THE BEST GUITAR TEACHER, OR YOUR MONEY BACK”, and has a fantastic list of super official out-of-context endorsements and quotes, such as gems like: 

  • I like your rhythm.” Frank Zappa.
  • You are THE MAN.” Barry Zito, Oakland A’s starting pitcher and Cy Young award winner.
  • Nice… nice.” Jazz virtuoso Joe Pass regarding Steve’s playing, after performing with Steve live at the Great American Music Hall, San Francisco.
Is Steve Dukes “legit”? Did Third Eye Blind learn everything they know from him, and therefore from John Cage (via proxy)? Should I enroll in his music rockcademy and learn to shred?
 
Will I graduate?

 

Stephan Jenkins Spotted Staring Slack-Jawed at Cheese-Only Restaurant

It was just over two months ago that the Third Eye Blind front man stood tall on the Bottom of the Hill stage and declared, “We're right at that moment before Valencia turns to complete shit.”  Now, he's bemused and excited about slamming his face with a plate of Mission Cheese's finest.

(In all fairness, cheese is a magical food product and we welcome its existence in all forms.)

[Photo by Fashionist]

Third Eye Blind on the Status of Valencia Street

Evidence as to why I should be banned from photographing concerts.

Because I've long aspired to be a 28-year-old man at a Third Eye Blind concert, I attended their semi-secret “urban disruptor mechanism“-transported gig last night at Bottom of the Hill.  The show itself was definitely a music concert, and the sea of people who hit puberty around 1997 were thrilled for what seemed to be a once-in-a-lifetime experience to hometown big name perform in a local small venue.  But the real hit happened when lead singer Stephan Jenkins—wearing the same flag-patched leather jacket he wore 16 years ago—shared his thoughts on Valencia Street between songs:

“We're right at that moment before Valencia turns to complete shit.”

Damn, pretty rough call from the guys that filmed the video for their breakout hit in front of Boogaloo's.

Third Eye Blind Takes Us on a Semi-Charmed Tour of the 1997 Mission District

For those with a fond memory of 90s pop music, Sunday marked the 15th anniversary of the release of alternative boy band Third Eye Blind's epic jam “Semi-Charmed Life.”  And an epic jam at that.  For many, the song marked the first opportunity for our bad young selves to con our oblivious parents into letting us buy a deceptively dark album because it sounded innocent. For others, an exemplary lurid journey into the fanciful whimsy of drug abuse.

However, ignoring the grim reality that this song is now fifteen-fucking-years-old (and that I actually know what day of the year it was released), its music video is of some serious San Francisco historical significance, as nearly all of it was filmed in the Mission and Dogpatch.

See, the summer of 1997 was a different time in the Mission.  Before all the tech industry types and foodies moved in, before the divisive and tumultuous years of anti-gentrification riots, the Mission was a lovely neighborhood exclusively populated by Latinos and happy-go-lucky tweakers.  And, lucky for us, four of those happy-go-lucky Jesse Pinkman's went on to sell millions of records and indirectly film a video for us neighborhood types to enjoy today.

Sadly, like so many other artifacts from our digital youth, no good copy of this music video exists on the internet, so we'll have to settle for the pixelated blur embedded above.

Below, the highlights:

After riding around the Dogpatch on scooters, lead singer Stephan Jenkins angrily stomps down Valencia Street past Valencia Cyclery, punching a wall for no apparent reason.

As Stephan approaches the corner of 22nd and Valencia, we watch as mid-90s Mission hipster, then known as a dweeb, types sonnets on a real life typewriter outside of Boogaloos, presumably while paying, like, a nickle for eggs.  As you may recall, in the mid-90s, portable electronic typewriters with fruit logos were not readily available, so kids had to haul around gnarly typewriters in their L.L. Bean backpacks with the initials “AZZ” stitched on the back.

Based on the man's layering of long-sleeved outerwear, we can surmise the weather was quite summer-like.

Here we see and the band performing in some empty unknown venue with a big old safe dial behind the stage.  Presumably, this place doesn't even exist anymore.

As the video takes an eastward turn down 22nd, we watch as a flock of mega babes flaunting it on their way to Make-Out Room.  All these girls probably have kids and live in Antioch now, which is just upsetting.

Stephan is shocked—SHOCKED!—that these girls walked passed him, so he visibly gasps in disbelief will strutting backwards towards Mission Street.

Bonus! We can see the old Leed's Shoe sign at the corner of 22nd and Mission, now a Skechers.

(Here's what this block looks like on the Google internet map.)

After getting shunned by the now-mothers, he proceeds to fellate a bunch of produce outside a market, currently a Latin lounge where iPhones go astray.

(Close-up of that market today, to the right of Anita's Beauty Salon.)

Following more bank safe jamming, Stephan goes on to throw a tantrum in an alley.  I'm not sure which alley this is (or why his sideburns are so thin), but it could be Poplar, near Papalote Taqueria:

Finally, Stephan walks across Potrero Hill's Abbey Road, wrapping up our tour of bougeoning 1997 San Francisco.