— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
I’m generally of the opinion that people don’t put up lame signage unless there is actually a problem. What’s up? Roaming packs of feral children knocking over beers and burgling sausages?
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
See that incredibly terrible photo of an ugly man’s hand holding a beautiful sandwich? Yeah, that’s THE PLANT Cafe’s “plant burger” and it’s goddamn amazing. Admittedly, I was skeptical about going there because it required that I leave the Mission and pay more than $6 for food but it was totally worth it. First off, I learned that the Embarcadero isn’t so bad. Second, I got to eat the plant burger, which is officially the most addicting drug I’ve ever ingested. I even went back a few days later to get it again. DANG.
In other news, they have really good ketchup.
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
I was reading the archives of a blog about college life on a campus that I’ve never been to when I came across this. Gold! Makes me wish I went to a white bread college in Santa Barbara. But really, why doesn’t this happen, say, every weekend in Dolores Park? We have the burritos, the requisite unemployment and appetite for logs of calories to make this happen. While I personally could not win the trophy, I would happily forge one to put next my Noble prize and college diploma.
(via Only in IV)
— By Jane Parton |
So curiosity (and not-at-all-420-related munchies) led my two friends and I to sample the controversial unsandwich known at KFC as the “Double Down.”
The Double Down consists of two pieces of boneless fried chicken, with jack cheese, bacon and the Colonel’s special sauce in between. Pretty appalling. With 540 calories, 32 grams of fat and 1380 milligrams of sodium, it’s truly a heartstopper. Reviews? I say … blech, bacon plus fried chicken is just too much, and I felt stomach acid and nausea before I even finished eating. I do not recommend it. My friend George somewhat agrees. My friend Ryan, on the other hand, is totally on board, proclaiming the Double Down his “new Burger King Quad Stacker.”
Has anyone else tried this monstrosity? Reactions?
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
I’ve walked past this place countless times over the years but just today noticed how fucking creepy this piece is. It starts off alright: some chef-pig elated with whatever he’s cooking up. What’s he cooking up? Other pigs, of course. This Jabba the Hutt looking pig appears to have just received the best fuck of its life as it lays spread eagle on the grill. Then this other pig is cutting up another pig with some gardening tools.
Look, I know not everyone in this world is blessed with the delicious diet of the vegetarian, but does swine cannibalism really make anyone hungry?
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Do you remember Mecca on 2029 Market? I don’t eat Oysters, so I don’t. But that place has been shut down for a wicked long time and some people who have mastered the art of handwriting that go by the name “Fam 888 Enterprises LLC” are angling to move into the space.
(via MrEricSir)
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
If you’re not both reading and taking in the sights over at Black Harbor, you’re missing out:
(random tangent) Poser is a funny word. People are trying to use hipster synonymously with poser these days, but I think those people need to shut the fuck up and stuff their face full of poser’s street cred. Brings me back to the days in high school when the store Zumies came into town and everywhere you looked kids were wearing skateboarding clothes. They didn’t skate. They didn’t deserve to wear the uniform. I hated them, we all did. We called them posers. Why is this relevant? Its not, unless you count that someone’s art stirs up vivid memories of my past which means it struck a cord. Good show!
(link)
— By Brizz |
I’d need a couple days to go into how fucked up this mural is, but if you’re looking to scare the shit out of your children into never eating fruits or vegetables again, take ‘em on up to Clay & Polk. I am impressed that this atrocity managed to get thrown up in such a high-income neighborhood, especially with that onion flipping everybody off with its penis hand. Good job Big Apple Discount Center!
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Grubstreet SF notes that a beer bar in Brooklyn called “Mission Dolores” has opened its doors. The website doesn’t mention anything about weed truffles, Cold Beer, Cold Water, impromptu concerts, or NIMBY neighbors, but I still have high hopes. Anyways, it’s like Shotwell’s, only in a part of the country that snows and Jay-z talks about every other verse. But yeah, props on someone at least attempting to get California beers on tap somewhere in the northeast. I only wish someone would open up a bar in SF that does beer from the Northeast. San Francisco gets a lot of things, like nice weather and alcoholism, but damn does it not get beer.
— By Serg |
yeah the Fillmore has never had decent mexican food, ever. There use to be Poblano something on golden gate and fillmore that shit was edible at least. Fucking La Salsa shut down, that was like Taco Bell but with 50% less dog food. Some how Fillmore Mexican Grill is still in business. I don’t know how the fuck that has happened, motherfuckers got sriracha on the tables. Look I’m down to give other races chances but when the Korean dude running the place can’t buy tapatio you know the place is fucked. I don’t even know if he’s Korean but he’s asian and considering the Koreans already own everything down there I’m going roll with that. Besides they already run the sushi spots, why not take over the mexican food too.
Anyways this isn’t about the Korean’s, it’s about their burritos made of cardboard and sludge accompanied by completely clueless awkward service. This combination of sucks naturally means that yelptards give it good reviews for “freshness.” Hey assholes, my shits are fresh too but I don’t eat them. Fuck this place, I can’t even tell you what I’ve eaten at this place because the fucking gruel they shovel into tortillas is so fucking bland all memory of what I actually ate there escapes me.
In the wake of La Salsa closing down Tacobar is opening this month. They are going with the freshness tag too but I got more faith in these dudes than Fillmore Mexican Grill. I mean fuck, you really can’t do any worse than all the other dumbasses who’ve tried to have taquerias on Fillmore. The closest competition is El Super Burrito on polk and that shit taste like a bucket of rotten dicks. You got Burrito Express on Divis which sometimes gets a edible pass but barely. Tortilla Whites if you want to get your happy hour on with a room full of Becky’s and Chad’s stuffing their faces with whitebread nachos and bowls of margarita bullshit. I’m really hoping Tacobar can come through, making a decent fucking taco can not be that fucking hard. I can’t even get tacos delivered anymore from the tenderloin (yeah it was that bad) since El Patron closed. I don’t always want to roll to the mission or make tacos myself. I just want to give someone some fucking money and eat some goddamn tacos. Can’t a motherfucker live?
Fuck I need to get out of this neighborhood, it’s killing me.