Highway to the DANGER ZONE!!!

Osama Bin Laden's Floating Metal Coffin To Take Center Stage At San Francisco Fleet Week This Weekend

— By Zach Perkins |

USS Carl Vinson prepares to go under the Golden Gate Bridge in 1995 (source: USN)

If yesterday's chorus of frightened neighborhood pets hadn't already clued you in, Fleet Week is here. This year's events are a bigger deal than usual for two very significant reasons. 1.) 2011 is the 100th Anniversary of Naval Aviation.  And 2.) The repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell.  Welcome to San Francisco, sailors.

Tomorrow's primetime events kick off with the 'Parade of Ships', which has the Navy puffing out their chests a hell of a lot more than last year.  Instead of just a couple of lame cruisers, propped up by some Coast Guard and Canadian Navy ships; this years line up features not one, but two aircraft carriers*. Leading the pack is the USS Carl Vinson, aka: the final resting place of Osama Bin Laden. Coincidentally, the Carl Vinson is the only ship not open for public tours. I smell conspiracy.
 
If high priced war machines aren't your thing, Sunday at Pier 39 will feature a few less militant attractions, including a performance from northern California band Mustache Harbor, which from the video featured on their website, is as ridiculous as it sounds. 
 
So to all my Mission-cool-kid-Fleet-week-haters, smell the jet fuel and embrace it. This is the one time of the year that we can sport our aviators, blast Kenny Loggins and hang out in the Marina with more than just our tired sense of 'irony' to back us up. 
 
 
 
*= Yes, I know that the USS Bonhomme Richard is technically an 'amphibious assualt vessel' and not a full aircraft carrier. Shut up nerd. 
Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Hybrid Carrier in SF for Fleet Week to Promote Making Sustainable War

— By Zach Perkins |

USS Makin Island passing under the GG yesterday.  

Pic via USN Specialist 2nd Class Glenn S. Robertson. 

It's Fleet Week again, which is why a team of F/A-18 Hornets were making strafing runs on your eardrums all afternoon.  The Blue Angels began practice at 1pm today and could be heard all over the Bay, even in my office in the East Bay with my headphones cranked up to 11.  Expect the same ruckus from 1pm to 4pm tomorrow while they conduct their final practice for the weekend's air show.  CUE THE OBLIGATORY KENNY LOGGINS VID!!! 

Yesterday the USS Makin Island cruised up the coast and arrived in San Francisco.  Mayor Newsome greeted and toured the Navy's brand new hybrid-powered ship, which is basically a Prius Aircraft Carrier, capable of moving at up to 12 knots on electricity alone.  According to the Chronicle, this will be the biggest Fleet Week celebration in 20 years, with six US Navy ships (plus some Coast Guard and Canuck Navy vessels) in comparison to only one US Navy ship last year.  

Expect a much more noticeable military presence in the city as well.  Last year only a small compliment of Navy sailors and six Marines ran amuck during Fleet Week.  This year there will be estimated 1000 Navy sailors and 600 Marines let loose upon the City Marina.  I mean fuck, there are only so many strip clubs in North Beach.  And ladies, should you hit up a karaoke bar this weekend, expect to be serenaded repeatedly to 'You've Lost That Loving Feeling.'  

Check out the schedule of Fleet Week events here, and the roster of vessels in port here.

Previously on Uptown Almanac: