— By Brizz |
First Joe’s Cable Car, where we got gang-raped with a $54 tab on two dry and flavorless cheeseburgers, fries, onion rings, and some sodas. Then the biggest let down of them all:
Pissed Off Pete’s, you should be the greatest bar in this city. You have the greatest name of a bar I have ever seen, maybe, but you are not living up to it. You should be dirty. Your bathroom should be a health hazard. There should be a man yelling obscenities, un-ironic trucker hats, a mid-afternoon stabbing, a plethora of Bukowskis bellied up to the bar, cigarette smoke, a TV with rabbit ears, someone should have threatened me as soon as I walked in. You have let me down, Pissed Off Pete’s. You have let me down with your cleanliness and your friendly bartender, your LCD TVs and your internet juke box. You will have an opportunity to redeem yourself on the Excelsior Bar Crawl I am organizing, stops including Coco’s, Pass Time, Broken Record and more.
Comments (13)
Pissed Off Pete’s is rad. I randomly happened in there during a Punk Show with a band called Farticus. Everyone was super friendly, especially the dude next to us who “just got out of Prison last week.” He eventually passed out on the bar for the headliner, but the conversation during the opening bands was stimulating. Oh, there was also a flier to some Hell’s Angels party at the Vallejo club house, so I think you must have gone on an off night because this bar is legit.
http://www.myspace.com/farticus666
Gang rape? You’re calling your decision to eat at a restaurant and pay what I have to assume were advertised prices GANG RAPE? YOU CAN’T GANG RAPE THE WILLING.
Gang banged? Also, I am well known for complaining about things I willingly participate in: http://thetenssf.tumblr.com/post/269967802/my-friend-boris-made-this-aft…
Hey, it’s nice to see my work getting some appreciation.
By the way, I’ve actually been gang-raped at Pissed Off Pete’s, so I found the comparison perfectly apt.
I don’t care what you elect to complain about; Brizz, you’re more than welcome to your opinions on things you participate in, willing or not. I just think the comparison of your restaurant experience and gang rape - quoting you directly - to be a bit, well, fucking ridiculous. I’ve never been to Joe’s, but I have to assume they posted their prices and you entered the restaurant and subsequent transaction of your own free will.
I know, I know - it’s the era of hyperbole and if every post isn’t the MOST SERIOUS ISSUE FACING OUR TIMES EVER or the best. goddamned. thing you’re gonna see all day, you risk losing page views on your FREE PROJECT I AM NOT PAYING TO READ SO I SHOULD PROBABLY JUST SHUT UP. I just found your comparison of your expensive burger to GANG RAPE - not a gang bang, but quoting you, “we got gang-raped” - to be more tasteless than your burger.
I guess Mission Mission readers finally found this blog.
We found it a while ago. But until recently there wasn’t enough hyperbolic whining and photos of poorly executed vandalism to allow for our painfully self-conscious and heavily sarcastic commentary.
I think I just got an unwanted handjob from YOUR ALL CAPS!
But, yes, fair enough, I see your point and had actually meant to change that characterization, but I didn’t, so fuck it. As far as it being more tasteless than the burger though, we’ll just have to agree to disagree.
Brizz made the term “gang rape” funny. Heh.
I would characterize Joe’s Cable Car as “Unwanted surprise sex”.
It’s not just the pairing of substandard fare with ludicrous pricing. No, what really says “prison sodomy” is the fucking television with Guy Fieri on infinite loop. I guess because he visited the restaurant once, they decided it was a good idea to make it a permanent part of the Joe’s Cable Car experience.
Ha, I didn’t notice the TV, but one of our least favorite things was the giant poster of Guy Fieri as we walked in the door.
Oh I saw it. You were facing the other way so you didnt have to stare at all the wall vomit while having the worst hangover of the year thus far.
http://farm5.static.flickr.com/401¼380711396_7545e6b0a0_o.jpg
yes, this place was maybe going to be the next hot spot for punk shows. and maybe it was going to be the next place for us weird outer mission kids to go, but NO! pete got pissed off and tried to choke a kid for nothing on top of a car outside. ridiculous. this place does not need the mission kids support!