Politics

Don't Forget to Vote Today! (And Don't Vote For Ed Lee)

TL;DR: Look up your polling place & Don't Vote for Ed Lee!

I've long resisted making any sort of political endorsement on this blog, solely because this isn't a political rag and we already have enough political propaganda hanging off our door knobs. However, I've spent a decent amount of time discussing the mayoral contest with my friends and neighbors over the past few months and the unfortunate truth is this: the majority of 20-something in the neighborhood have only lived in SF for 6 months-3 years, moved here to either work in tech/related marketing industries or go to school, and have no idea what's going on in the election. Many still don't know who they are voting for and barely know the names of all the front-runners, never mind the candidate's positions on the issues that matter.

This is not anyone's fault. There's something like 80 people running for Mayor.  They're almost all Democrats who have worked for The City at some point (being either elected or appointed) and all pretty much agree with each other's views. The rest are a hodgepodge of activists, Valley VC's, Mission bar owners, and journalists.  I think I even read somewhere that Broke-Ass Stuart was running as “broke-ass” write-in campaign.

There's just too much to keep up with, and our “Interim Mayor” has leveraged the confusion and lack of populist consensus for his own benefit.

He secured a bunch of fancy endorsements from out-of-town tech billionaires (none of whom are registered to vote in SF), sports celebrities (including the man trying to move the 49ers out of SF), and rappers (one from Los Angeles and the other being the poster child for fireball failure), had Napster founder and known-pervert Sean Parker donate $100,000 to cover the costs of producing a viral video, and had TechCrunch plug him with a thinly-veiled endorsement (the same publication also called Google Wave “the future,” but I digress).

And it worked! I keep hearing from of Mission Kids who plan on voting for Ed Lee because he released a goofy campaign video and Michael Arrington likes him and he saved Twitter from going bankrupt or whatever and Brian Wilson told them to “do it.”

Don't.

The simple fact is Ed Lee is “the next in line” in the ineffectual political dynasty that Willie Brown and Gavin Newsom established 16 years ago.  If you believe the direction SF has taken in those years has been a good one, then you should vote for Ed Lee—he's your guy.  But if you're like the rest of us—those of us who believe that the technological epicenter of the world should be able to figure out how to make Muni functional, that mid-Market doesn't need to be a shithole, that events like Halloween in the Castro and Bay to Breakers and street fairs shouldn't be shut down because of civic ineptitude, that our roads shouldn't be covered in potholes, we shouldn't be selling out our city to big business, etc. etc. etc.—then Ed Lee is NOT your guy.  He's just the next cog in the machine that hasn't been getting it done since the mid-90s.

There's a lot of great candidates to vote for today.  While I won't say whom I'm voting for (although you can probably figure it out), I sat down with a few friends over the weekend to make a website explaining the reasons you shouldn't vote for Lee.  Read it.  Share it.  Hopefully we make a convincing case.

Polls opened an hour ago.  Get out there and do your thing.

[Photo via reader John J.]

Matt Gonzalez Shares His Thoughts on the Mayoral Race

As the mayoral contest rapidly devolves into a meaningless viral video of has-been rappers and quirky-for-hire baseball pitchers endorsing machine politicians because their last name rhymes with a frozen pie manufacture, it's refreshing to see the former Board of Supervisor President getting out there and steering the conversation back to actual issues.

[via Mat Honan]

Are SFPD Officers Capable of Treating San Franciscans Like Human Beings?

Look SFPD, we get it.  Between all the gang wars, drug dealers, and cyclists riding through stop signs, you have your hands full.  The Mission is happening nearly every hour of every day, yet you somehow manage to keep the 'hood from looking like 7th and Market.  You deal with the complaints of geezer neighbors without totally ruining the fun.  You look away when we spark a joint.  And no one has ever watched you slap a pair of cuffs on Cold Beer Cold Water.

For all that, most residents give you well-deserved credit.

But every time we start thinking SFPD isn't all that bad, you go pull a stunt that reminds us all that you employ some of the most toolish douchebags to ever live in the City and County of San Francisco.

Take yesterday's closing of Sunday Streets.  Argubly one of the most successful civic events in the city, Sunday Streets brings thousands of San Franciscans from every corner of the city together to enjoy motor-free streets for five measly hours.  The streets are lined with musicians, neighbors barbequing on their stoops, local merchants and cooks flipping their wares, children learning bike polo, people adoring low riders, kids going nuts with chalk, art bikes, costumed rollerbladers, and even dance lessons.  The community the event fosters is enough to bring a smile to even the most cynical dipshit's face.

So when the public's time was up, how'd you close down the event?  Send officers walking down the street, politely telling people to move to the sidewalks? Dispatch the Mission's bicycle cops down Valencia to assist in winding the event down?  Strap rollerskates on officers dressed like The Village People and kick people off the streets?

No, you sent Officer Power Trip and his sidekick Sargent Shitbag down Valencia on motorcycles, wailing on their sirens, yelling over the loudspeaker to get on the sidewalk, and accelerating into crowds of people so they'd jump to the curb.  And it wasn't jump unemployed kids on fixies you treated like this.  No, these trailblazers in misdirected anger chirped their horns at families in the street, yelled at merchants that hurriedly dragged their belongings to the curb.  Hell, I even saw the officer pictured above accelerate his motorcycle right into former city supervisor and mayoral candidate Bevan Dufty and his volunteers.

Your department treats families, neighbors, and generally lovely people with the same respect you show #OpBART protesters.  What the fuck is wrong with you?

John Avalos to Host Happy Hour at Fashionable Capp Street Dive

Everyone already loves Uptown for its cheap drinks, bathroom art, and the various lifeforms growing on the furniture.  But if you're one of the few people that needs a specific reason to visit the place, you can head over Saturday afternoon to put back whiskey-cokes and bro down with a mayoral candidate—The People's Candidate, no less.

The event promises learning about John's party-positive vision for San Francisco, which presumably involves pool, blasting Metallica, and key bumps in the bathroom.

See you there!

Rap the Vote

Leland Yee Secures Coveted Too $hort Endorsement

Sen. Leland Yee, a 62-year-old man running for SF mayor on the theme of providing free Muni passes for children and making the sky rain watermelon Four Loko, just locked up Too $hort’s prized endorsement and the support of $hort’s political machinery.  And what does this mean for you?  An epic party with Mr. “BBIIAAATTTCCCHHHH” himself:

Bay Area hip-hop legend Too $hort will headline this party to benefit the Leland Yee for San Francisco Mayor campaign. The party will include a special performance by San Francisco rapper Big Rich. Rap the vote with friends and supporters of Leland Yee while making sure you’re registered to vote this November.

While that description doesn’t sound much like a party, our friend Hater Tuesday gives us a taste of what poetic genius you can expect from $hort on stage:

  • “How you gonna be broke when you got a pussy?”
  • “What the fuck were ya’ll doin in ’89? Most ya’ll in here were in 3rd grade listenin’ to Too $hort. You wanna know what I was doin’ in ’89? I was a grown ass man. I had a drop top Cadillac, a big ass cellphone, big ropes danglin’ from my neck …driving cross the Bay Bridge gettin’ my dick sucked.”
  • “Square bitches shut the fuck up!”
  • “They told me to stop taking weed from the white people in the crowd.”
  • “There is a girl in the front row right here… I just want to fuck her face. Girl, I feel like my dick and your face have a connection.”
  • “I be fuckin’ aunties. It used to be baby sisters, now it’s aunties. I’m 45….nigga been around. Ya’ll laugh but I’m telling you, Too $hort fucked your auntie….And some mammas. Investigate. Find out ask some aunties. Don’t be surprised when they like, “How you know I fucked $hort?”

It goes down next Wednesday (Oct. 12th!) for a scant $30 donation to Yee’s campaign.  See you there!

[Pic by Troy Holden]

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