Life

The Golden Hour: A Live Talk Show About SF Debuts Saturday!

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Oakland Nights…Live! has been going strong for almost a year now, so they've decided to bring their non-radio radio show (or, as they describe it, “half Johnny Carson, half Pee-Wee’s Playhouse, half Fresh Air”) to foggier pastures with The Golden Hour.  What can we expect?  The Golden Hour's stage manager Karina fills us in:

It's going to be a quirky, funny collection of small skits, comedy bits, announcements, and maybe a song or two. It's framed as a radio talk show but nothing is recorded - it's a live performance. There is usually audience participation. It really has its roots in San Francisco. A lot of the ideas we've talked about incorporating involve current events in the city and the backdrop we've made include SF landmarks.

They're also promising an infusion of fake sponsors, an appearance by local stand-up Eric Cash, and a spot by Stephen Prescott (who hosts the Doctor Who podcast), so you'll want to be there.

It's all happening at 7pm Saturday at the freshly remodeled Bissap Baobab Village on 19th.  Five bucks at the door!

[Photo by Jonathan Lee B.]

Impersonator Misses Hunky Jesus Contest by 143 Days

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Uptown reader “ALWAYS HIGH” (shrug) sent along this snap of Jesus carrying a cross down Mission Street, noting “I found Jesus today.”

We can only assume that either (1) this man is unfortunately very late for Dolores Park's Hunky Jesus Contest or (2) he's being nailed up somewhere between Thrift Town and the methy Walgreens.

This Poor Bastard Really Needs a Place to Live (Only in the Mission)

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

I generally ignore shit taped to poles, but I can't resist a sloth in a top hat waving at me:

Ah yes, the classic bait-and-switch.  Promise me sloth people, only to find out you have homeless fire victims in stock.  Harrumph.

But there's a sad subtext to all this… mainly, that some poor, guitar-playing artist kid from Texas cannot find anyone to take his monthly allowance of $880 in exchange for a place to live.  Completely rejected by Craig and The Lists, Kyle Welch and his friend are taping flyers appealing to sloth people on every pole, box, and parklet along Valencia:

Ever since the fire, Kyle has been looking for a place to live and has had no success.  Craigslist people won't respond, prices are rising, and opportunities are not rising for this fair fellow.  It sickens me. I believe this has a lot to do with all the tech dorks, sky-rocketing the rents in the Mission and thats [sic] just not fair.

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

What Was Up With That Giant Blue and Green Flash Over the Neighborhood Last Night?

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

While I was out “getting tacos” around 2 a.m. last night, the sky lit up with this wild blue and green flash.  I'm not talking fireworks either, but an odd, pulsing glow that consumed everything.

At first I thought I must've got some bad meat in my taco, but then the power went out and everyone else around also seemed to notice it.  The general consensus was either that Richmond Chevron refinery was up to no good again or aliens were waging war with Fremont, so I went to bed.

Turns out we were all wrong, just some drunk driver nailing a telephone pole near SF General:

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