Uptown Almanac

Saibong, although she doesn't mention a reward, I am sure Julia will kick down a high-five

Posted by Brizz on Mon, 02/08/2010 - 7:38pm

Categorized: Art - The Streets, Life, Mission District

Tagged: found

For a second, I thought about blocking out her number, but then how will Saibong call her? Also, she posted this on the corner of 14th and Valencia, and I think more people walk by there then read anything I post. Part of me is worried that this is just a cruel prank by Saibong, who, not being content with spending Julia's money and running up her credit cards, left a fake number in order to get Julia's hopes up, only to crush them back down. Restore my faith in humanity, Saibong.

BREAKING: Twitter good for something!

Posted by Laura B on Mon, 02/08/2010 - 3:59pm

Categorized: Capitalism, Eats and Beers

Tagged: better late than never so BACK OFF, depression 2.0, you ain't above it

Annnnnnnd that's why you should be following Grocery Outlet on twitter.

Gross Out, I love you.

Happy Valentine's Day from Uptown Almanac! Part 2!

Posted by Laura B on Mon, 02/08/2010 - 2:36pm

Categorized: Fashion, Romance & Sex

Tagged: get back to me when it's fabric of lil' kim and biggie doing it, i have a feeling you're gonna see a lot of that at burning man this year, modern baby, sexbric

In the worlds of late, great ODB, "sexy, sexy, sexy." Also, PUKE. Also, to each their own so ORDER AWAY, PERVS! I can't wait until some "creative" freak makes reusable diapers out of this stuff WHAT YOU KNOW IT'S GONNA HAPPEN.

Came from local sexleb, Violet Blue (via Eve Batey!), so it's okay for UA. Like i needed to explain that seeing as it's basically martial law over here.

Yogis! Here is your chance to help Haiti!

Posted by Laura B on Mon, 02/08/2010 - 1:38pm

Categorized: Activism, Being Green, Scary Larry, Sports

Tagged: JUST WOW, marina

The Pad is like WHOA. In other news, I'm collecting iPhones, Mac Book Pros (new, in box), and Rainbow gift certificates to send over to Haiti, contact me for more info!

(via James Fallows)

Happy Valentine's Day from Uptown Almanac!

Posted by Laura B on Mon, 02/08/2010 - 12:49pm

Categorized: Romance & Sex

Tagged: actually my dream scenario involves a trail of foil pedals to a bed filled with candy so i'm kinda into it, things that may or may not get you laid, those foil wrapped kisses are dope too

BevMo! on Bayshore is selling these gorgeous foil wrapped chocolate roses. Although they surely have them as a Valentine's Day item, they are Always in good taste (r).

We wish we could buy one for all the beautiful ladies of the world.

While You Were Getting Faced With Bud Light Watching Bros Push Eachother Across 100 Yards of Astroturd, The Muni Was Making Fire Fighting More Difficult

Posted by Kevin Montgomery on Sun, 02/07/2010 - 9:16pm

Categorized: Haight

Seriously, a bus crashed into a fire hydrant in Lower Haight tonight. Fucking AWESOME.

UPDATE: Vid from Elly.

Fashion Town

Posted by Serg on Sun, 02/07/2010 - 2:33pm

Categorized: Fashion

Fashion Town is my go to spot for a birthday gift for a friend. I really want to get my wife that Boom Boom Pow shirt in the top right. Only issue with shirts with hella glitter is that you have to handwash this shit unless you want all your other clothes to be sparkly too. I would rock a lot of their gear but all the shit for dudes are crazy tall tees and I can't get down with that unfortunately.

San Francisco Mission Style Cal-Mex

Posted by Kevin Montgomery on Sun, 02/07/2010 - 12:14pm

Categorized: Mission District, Romance & Sex, Travels and Tales

Tagged: Akon wants to fuck you but you already know, hyphy-local, my mind ACTUALLY WORKS LIKE THIS

My buddy Lander chased tail all the way to NYC and spotted this upper west side. Beyond the obvious question of "what the fuck is cal-mex?," I really feel like "mission style" is more of a raunchy 'hyper-local' sex position than brand o' burrito. Usually this the point of the blog post where I attempt to define said position, but considering if I was taken hostage for all the state secrets I know and my captors pulled off all my fingers to torture me, I could still count the number of times I've had sex in the Mission on one hand, I probably am not the most qualified to do such a thing. Maybe it's getting thrown up against the bathroom wall at Farolito by some drunk vegan girl wearing bright yellow lycra tights? Or maybe doing the "Donald Hump" in the Mission Police Station bathroom while listening to I Want Pussy by Ol' Dirty Bastard over your crappy iPhone speakers?

Someone fill me in.

"I'd like to submit into evidence that Kevin Montgomery's iTunes library implicates him in the crime of listening to Haddaway's "What is Love?," followed by Ja Rule's "Holla Holla," at 3:32am last evening."

Posted by Kevin Montgomery on Sun, 02/07/2010 - 10:56am

Categorized: Fashion

Tagged: Don't worry the next song I listened to was Perfect Gentleman by Wyclef, I really owe my roommates breakfast

I also bought this:

Zazzle is the amateur porn of the fashion industry, but that doesn't mean I love it any less. Up until last night, I didn't think there was anything redeeming about San Mateo. Then I found this shirt. "Finally, something to love. Where is my company credit card? Why yes, I would love another shot of plastic-bottle vodka and a Frank's RedHot chaser."