Bernalwood Wants to Know Why There Aren't Any "Hipsters" In Bernal Heights

The answer to that question is there is no such thing as a “hipster.”  But, let us allow them to explain their theory anyway:

It’s a question that’s no doubt top-of-mind for every armchair sociologist in the neighborhood: Given our proximity to the Mission, to say nothing of our spiritual and aesthetic affinity to same, why doesn’t Bernal Heights have a higher concentration of hipsters?

My analysis suggests the answer lies squarely at the intersection of Fashion Boulevard and Topography Way. Specifically, the relative dearth of hipsters in Bernalwood can only be explained by the fact that riding around here on a fixie just plain sucks. In the hipster’s obligatory skinny jeans, it may even be impossible. Ergo, few hipsters.

Nope, that's not it.  In fact, two of the biggest industry dirt bags I know lived up in Bernal before moving out of town.  One, in fact, used to co-own a messenger company, so if their theory is solely baked around the tired “hipsters ride fixies” stereotype, they got it wrong.

So, why don't cool kids want to live in Bernal Heights?  Is it because there is no critical mass of people migrating there?  Is it because the view from the top of Dolores is all one needs?  It's too quiet?  No bars?  Too many kids??  Because Bernal Heights residents generalize and mock modern urban culture???

(photo by Bernalwood)

Comments (11)

Meow…………..!

I fucking love wild side west and I don’t want kids that look like me ruining it.

Root cause = real estate. Bernal is full of nice, single family homes owned by real adults (ergo, not hipsters) that don’t offer the $700/month rent one might pay in the Mission. Plenty of hipsters at the base of Bernal (see: the Knockout) where a cheap apartment is easy to find.

…$700/month rent one might pay in the Mission

Even the crack den “hotels” are more expensive than that.

I pay $800/month for a fairly nice place. Not that unreasonable to pay less for a crappier place.

This is likely the case, yes. No damn hipster is going to swing my $1850 rent.

Errrr Kevmo, the whole post was tongue-in-cheek … except the part about organizing a hillclimb.

Also, yes, you can push a baby stroller up Folsom.

I’ve done it.

It really sucks.

Maybe it’s just because Glen Park is still a secret to them…

I’ve aspired to be a Bernal Heights hipster mom since last week when I found out that Navajo patterned Pendleton blankets come in “crib size.” I’m even willing to settle for Bernal Heights hipster step-mom … watch out Four Barrel DILFs, I’m comin’ for ya!

Hipsters are the only people who don’t think hipsters exist. Doiii.