John Avalos

John Avalos's Twitter Account Hacked By People Who Think John Avalos's Supporters Could Stand to Lose A Few Pounds

Earlier this morning, former mayoral candidate and current San Francisco Supervisor John Avalos's Twitter account was phished by an elite team of weight-conscious hackers.  In a probably not exclusive DM to Uptown Almanac, Avalos's hackers asked if we saw this pic of us, noting the picture was pretty “lol”.  They then went on to imply all Avalos's fans and followers were fat, suggesting we look into “the fastest ways to lose body fat in 2 weeks” (corrected for grammar).  Bummer, dude.

John Avalos to Host Happy Hour at Fashionable Capp Street Dive

Everyone already loves Uptown for its cheap drinks, bathroom art, and the various lifeforms growing on the furniture.  But if you're one of the few people that needs a specific reason to visit the place, you can head over Saturday afternoon to put back whiskey-cokes and bro down with a mayoral candidate—The People's Candidate, no less.

The event promises learning about John's party-positive vision for San Francisco, which presumably involves pool, blasting Metallica, and key bumps in the bathroom.

See you there!

Look Ma, No Hands!

I'm not quite sure what this has to do with the mayoral election, but human pandering machine John Avalos recently released a Cut Copy music video of himself biking around San Francisco.  And quite the spread it is! He turns the anti-protest ride protest ride, SF Bike Party, into an impromptu campaign rally, shows off his chops as a bike mechanic, rides back-and-forth in front of Valencia Cyclery a half dozen times, and demonstrates that the decaying mess beneath his wheels on Market Street isn't enough to throw him off balance.

See for yourself:

Political Candidates Continue to Lay it on Thick for Mission Voters

This year's crop of mayoral candidates sure are doing their best to “connect” with the Mission's youth activist power bloc.  They've invaded Sunday Streets, swept through Dolores Park, collected signatures and volunteer information at Phono del Sol, hung out at taquerias, and Avalos even spun records at Knockout.

The latter was probably the most brilliant move of the all the campaigns thus far.  Not only did it give Avalos tons of free press, but it put him smack dab in the middle of Cool Kid Central, giving him a captive audience to show off the human side of the politician.  Who knows if it did his campaign any good though.  As one attendee put it, “I don't know if I'd vote for him because all I really know about him is that he thinks Twist & Shout is one hell of a jam.”

While Avalos “gets it,” the victim of this pandering race-to-the-bottom is George Gascón, the police chief-turned-district attorney running to maintain his Newsom-appointed position.  George recently walked around Dolores Park trying to connect with young voters who had no idea who the hell he was.  As he slowly meandered through the throngs of kids, he cautiously waved at the people sitting below him, who were visibly concerned if this white haired man was suffering from dementia and needed help finding his caretaker.  When he approached my crew, I shouted out “Hey, Dennis Herrera!” and the sorry son of a bitch so flattered that someone recognized him as a politician that he cracked a wide smile and waved for my lone cellphone.

With the sun overhead, he almost looked angelic in his desperation.

[First photo by Alissa]