Photography

Fortuna

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Do you follow Nuzz on Flickr yet?  You should.  He's one of the Mission's more epic amateur photographers and takes epic photos of epic locations in epic lighting.  Like this photo above.  Ain't it just swell?  I thought so.

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CARNAVAL 2010

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Apparently there is this thing called Carnaval in the Mission.  Neat!  Unfortunately it starts at 9:30 in the morning (7:30 if you live anywhere near the hippie drum circle warm-up lounge).   Anyways, because I assume most of you had better things to do with your morning, like have sex and eat Lucky Charms, I took my 7-year-old point-and-shoot that has survived two drops in the toilet (I like taking pictures of myself peeing) and my 5-month-old iPhone.  Which do you think took better photos?  Enjoy:

My Carnaval started out just right: two smug white people complaining about “idiots” using disposable coffee cups.  For a hot second, I mumbled “fucking tourists.”  Then I remembered I was in San Francisco.

Carnaval 2010 Press Pool

Carnaval is the only time of the year when you can be coked out swinging a machete down 24th and not get shot by police.

The world's most embarrassing gang initiation ceremony.

The street closures presented the perfect opportunity for hipster divas to take “epic profile pics.”

I initially photographed this girl because I thought she looked like Cousin Itt.

After Zorro here tried to whip my camera out of my hand, he discovered his cape wasn't bullet-proof.

It was truly a hallmark year for fashion.  For example, this bro managed to incorporate every one of the hipster primary colors into his outfit.

Here is my proof that I witnessed a celebrity sighting.

I kept waiting for Peter Parker to change into his Spideysuit, but it never happened.

Anyways, what was my favorite scene of Carnaval 2010?

Want.

Giant, Multi-Headed, Fire-Breathing, Heavy Metal Buddha Going Up at City Hall

— By Brizz |

Man, you thought the Jesus-freaks hated San Francisco before, wait’ll they get wind of this thing. They started putting up Zhang Huan’s multi-headed beast of a Buddha across from City Hall today. Unfortunately, I don’t think it’s fire-breathing after all, but they should definitely consider an upgrade. Here’s some reporting on it from the Examiner, which I believe is some sort of  print newspaper. I’m just glad I don’t have to go hang out with a bunch of dread-locked, drugged-up, dirt twirlers in the desert to see crazy, giant statues like this. So, good job to whoever is responsible for this.

I did not notice a Banksy stencil on any of it, so this will probably not be of much interest to most of you, but it is throwing up heavy metal horns:

I was going to make a post making fun of people flocking to photograph the new Banksy piece but, ummm, yeah

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Don’t get me wrong, I got a chubby over this too, but do we really need a news van?  They took 4 takes of some not-fashionable (in Mission terms) walking out of the Curiosity Shoppe.  It was wicked intense.

Also, two hipsta chicas rolled up in a 90’s SUV (earth day DANG) and started taking pictures with no less than 5 different cameras.  One of them even looked like it used manual film.  I feel like if you are going to photograph Banksy, you shouldn’t be doing it with technology (excluding Hipstamatic and Razrs, of course), since that is ‘contrary to his ideals’ and ‘fucking lame.’

Anyways, go over and check it out.  It’s fantastic.

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

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