Bagel Beef: Village Voice Shreds Schmendricks

Nothing gets San Franciscan's adrenal glands a flutter quite like New Yorkers coming to town to tell us what they think of our food.  And it makes sense—New York is our cool big brother who owns an iPod and can drive.  He dates babes we dream about at night and sneaks smokes behind the shed. He's so cool.

Thankfully, big brother recently stopped being The Coolest Ever to dispense us with his thoughts on our burgeoning bagel business, Schmendricks.  By way of The Village Voice's “Annals of Absurdity” column, some dude named Robert takes on the Mission bagel pop-up (argh) that operates out of Fayes, lamenting the lack of authenticity the company claims so vigorously to have.  He even consults a second (NY native!!) source for verification:

According to the preachy and earnest statement on the Schmendricks website, toasting these bagels is prohibited: “If you're not sure how to properly treat this thing, we'll have to ask you to give it back to us. This is an authentic Brooklyn bagel. That means it was hand-rolled and boiled before it was baked.” Not sure what “Brooklyn bagel” means vis-à-vis New York bagels in general, but the statement goes on to say that plain, sesame, poppy, onion, garlic, and salt are the only authentic bagel flavors, and “even an everything bagel pushes the limits of authenticity.”

Balderdash! I asked Van Dyk (a New York City native) what she thought of Schmendricks pretentious and expensive bagels. Her reply was terse: “Outside is way too tough. Bagel is tiny. It's also a bit yeasty tasting. Very hard to chew through,” suggesting Schmendricks is boiling its bagels much too long (45 seconds to two minutes is plenty).

Well, shit!  While I agree that charging three bucks for a bagel is a bit much, I actually thought their bagels were pretty damn good.  But I guess that's why big brother doesn't bring me along to all the cool parties.

[Village Voice]

Schmendricks Brooklyn Bagels is Launching with a Party

I know this is an unappetizing photo of appetizing bagels, but you should pay attention anyway.  Why?  Because San Francisco's bagel scene has historically sucked shit, but then Schmendricks Brooklyn Bagels came along and changed the fucking game (I'm cussing because I'm excited).  Finally, a puffy bagel that tastes like a proper meal, rather than some circular afterthought.  Perhaps more importantly, a bagel that makes me want to eat bagels again.

Enough gushing.

After a few months of weekend pop-ups and a casual delivery service, the Schmendricks folks are stepping up their blooming bagel empire (we can only hope this means daily sales in various neighborhood cafes in the near future).  In doing so, they're kicking it off with a launch party at Four Barrel on May 10th:

Sure, 20 bucks might be a tad steep, but you get one free adult beverage.  And bagels.  So many bagels.

So if launch parties and bagels and adult beverages are you kinda thing, head over to their Eventbrite and plop down your credit card. 

Schmendricks "Brooklyn-Style Bagels" Debuts Tomorrow at Fayes!

There's a real lack of acceptable bagels in this town.  Wise Sons was a step in the right direction, but their bagels are only sold on Saturdays.  Luckily, now there's Schmendricks, who'll be having their bagels sold out of local cafes (beginning with Fayes on 18th) STARTING TOMORROW:

So, how about we finally let you taste some bagels? This Sunday (February 26, 2012), we'll be selling some Schmendricks outside of Fayes Video & Espresso Bar on 18th Street in the Mission. We're viewing this as a sort of baby step in the direction of our official launch, but we hope a few of you will be able to come out and join us. A fresh bagel with a schmear and a cup of Faye's coffee should be a pretty good way to start your Sunday.

There's a really long SF Weekly article if you want to know more about their roots.  Or, you could just show up tomorrow morning and START STUFFING YOUR FACE.