People

Cold Beer, Huge Profits

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

On Saturday I was fortunate enough to run into Dolores Park hero and San Francisco's best dressed businessman “Cold Beer, Cold Water” at the corner of 19th and Guerreo refilling his cooler with three cases of PBR.  While there isn't anything inherently notable about spotting a crazy person holding beer and throwing trash on the sidewalk, by the time I was done fetching some food and booze from Rhea's, 20 minutes had passed he was already back resuppling. 

Now, I'm not advocating trying to solve complicated math problems while at Dolores, but considering he sells a case of beer for $30 bucks (2 cans for $5), this dude is turning a profit of $60 every 20 minutes.  Sure, sales are probably not always that great, but on weekends like we just had, he can easily rake in over $700 in a 4 hours thanks to our collective laziness.

So, a tip of the hat to you, CBCW.  You took people being too lazy to walk a block for beer and made it into a printing press.

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

The Beard Is Back

— By Kate Horton |

Today SF Giants closer and beard ambassador to the world Brian Wilson made his triumphant return to Twitter. You may recall Wilson got himself into a bit of hot water two seasons ago with his first Twitter account. 

No word on how Kanye West feels about his new competition for most interesting tweeter or who advised Wilson to wear that horrible droopy condom on his head.

(photo of Wilson at Twitter HQ via Aaron Durand)

Skateboarder Goes Big on Two Cops, Gets Away With It

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

The Bay Citizen has the scoop on TL badass and skateboarder Matthew Hoyt, who punched two cops in the face and got a jury to acquit him:

Hoyt says he was riding his skateboard in a bicycle lane through the Tenderloin on his way to San Francisco Pride festivities in the Civic Center on June 26 when a motorist behind him began honking his horn.

Rude words and gestures were exchanged before the driver, who Hoyt says failed to identify himself as a police officer, swerved across lanes and used his car to box the skateboarder in between parked cars.

Assuming that the driver wanted to fight, Hoyt punched him through the open window, and then grabbed his board and scrambled over the car’s hood.

The passenger, also an off-duty officer, got out of the car and Hoyt punched him in the face too.

After flipping them off and punching them in the face, they identified themselves as cops, tackled him, and knee-dropped the back of his head.  Instead of getting tossed in jail for assaulting two off-duty officers, Hoyt is now pursuing a formal complaint against the officers for beating him up “a bit.”  Rad.

(link)

Dying Breed: Jim Carrasco, Chronicle Deliveryman

— By Zach Perkins |

Not Pictured: Jim Carrasco.

Postcards From SF gives us [ie: teh people of teh interwebz] this outstanding short look at SF Chronicle deliveryman and Tenderloin icon Jim Carrasco.  

Carrasco, a “character of the night” and self described “ghost dancer” (I think that means he's like 'Dances With Crackheads' or something, via Kevin Costner,) is one of the last remaining Union newspaper deliverymen in San Francisco. He's operated in the wee hours of SF for decades and knows the characters of the street well. He himself is a great character worthy of a much longer documentary. Kind of like a Geraldo meets Atari's Paperboy in a Tenderloin back alley, but with a sense of humor and more infected needles.

Painting Over Vandalism is Also Vandalism

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

The SF Examiner hips us to the urban art movement developing in McLaren Park:

When 23-year-old Aaron Perry-Zucker first moved to the Excelsior neighborhood last summer, he noticed the large amount of graffiti covering signs and benches in John McLaren Park that differed from the green space near his former Berkeley home. […]

Around Thanksgiving of last year, Perry-Zucker — a graphic designer by trade — decided to paint over the tags himself. Normally The City uses muted brown or standard grey to cover up graffiti, but Perry-Zucker wanted to use more attractive colors.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for ORFN tags on park benches, but if you're one to complain about such matters, its seems Aaron's course of action is a good one.  How does the the City feel about it?

“The public is not allowed to paint over city property at will, no matter how bright and colorful the paint,” said Recreation and Park Department spokesman Elton Pon.

Pon encouraged all residents to report graffiti using The City’s free tip line, 311.

Nice.

(link) 

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Local Badass Makes Army of Fire-Breathing Bikes

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Speaking of San Franciscans with rad bike collections, the folks at Mission Local did a quick interview with Jason Broemmel, bike builder over at Complete Fabrications, maker of the famed dragon and Golden Gate Bridge bikes.  Apparently, this local badass has also made a bike called “The Chupacabra,” which has arms that move as you ride, a mouth that opens and BREATHS FUCKING FIRE.

He also has a few other bikes, but none as cool as the green monster equipped with a banana seat.  Check it:

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Deep's Rickshaw Arsenal

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Deep, the friendly fellow who makes it out to all the cycling events around town with his blue 3-wheeler equipped with an Michael Jackson-bumpin' soundsystem, was doing a bit of garage cleaning this afternoon and had is epic array of bikes out on display.  To say his collection of rickshaws is badass is to say the least, but this particular ride really stole the show:

Deep says he scored this 1957 Thai rickshaw on eBay while hunting for the red rickshaw seen to the left of the first pic.  Rather than pick one or the other, he just bought both.  He says the thing weighs a ton so he rarely takes it out, but the details on this beast are incredible.

  

Needless to say, if anyone has a spare 1957 Thai rickshaw that they don't want anymore, do let me know.

Pages