Uptown Almanac

Baby Pigeons Need Saving

Posted by Kevin Montgomery on Mon, 03/01/2010 - 4:29pm

Categorized: Mission District, Pets & Animals

Tagged: Pigeons are certain ugly as babies

Abandoned outside of Bender's. Don't worry, Animal Control was going to "find it a home."

San Franciscans Have the Best Taste in Cars

Posted by Kevin Montgomery on Mon, 03/01/2010 - 4:11pm

Categorized: Mission District

Other cities are not like this. Only in San Francisco can you see more classic cars than crackheads on a daily basis. And the owner's willingness to park these badboys all over the city? Inspiring. A mere 21 hours previously, I watched a pimp teach a lady how to be a prostitute in this very location. Now rests 2000 pounds of yellow badassery.

Zipcar Launches Hyperlocal Campaign!

Posted by Laura B on Mon, 03/01/2010 - 2:36pm

Categorized: Art - The Streets, Crime, Mission District

Tagged: dia de los zipcars, my dog peed on that prius

Their new guerilla advertising tactics, spotted at 24th & Mission. ABC, Zipcar!

Free rides, ahoy!

Posted by Laura B on Mon, 03/01/2010 - 1:01pm

Tagged: Muni, sir scams a lot, steals & deals

I kid, you can't/shouldn't really do that. STAY IN SCHOOL!!!

Thanks, Monica!

"It's quite obvious that this cyclist hasn't heard of target fixation. What works on the playa, may not fly so well on the mean streets of San Francisco."

Posted by Kevin Montgomery on Mon, 03/01/2010 - 2:11am

Categorized: Bicycles, Fashion, Mission District

Tagged: i have a feeling you're gonna see a lot of that at burning man this year, Perez Pink is totally going to make a hipster revival this year

Nuzz knows what's up.

Cheesy Tater Tots: Better Than Sex

Posted by Kevin Montgomery on Sun, 02/28/2010 - 2:27pm

Categorized: Eats and Beers

Tagged: I try so hard to be vegan and then someone flashes melted cheese in my face and I'm like AH HELL NO

Back in the day when I fed myself by way of being a bike wrench, I once referred to a riding of one my new bikes as "better than sex." One of the other mechanics responded by saying "either you have never had sex or you need to find a new bitch." 'though that his smack-down was so epic that I rarely refer to as anything as "better than sex" anymore. All that said, Bender's cheesy tater tots are better than sex. Okay, not literally, but these tots are no Capp Street Hooker of the culinary world. Four kinds of cheese melted on top of milf fucking tater tots. As you can see from my crappy picture, I nearly finished the basked before I figured the internet might care about what I had for dinner last night. So good I put something ahead of the internet. That's some serious shit right there.

Be sure to pour a little bit of your Czechvar out for our bovine brethren.

2001

Posted by Kevin Montgomery on Sun, 02/28/2010 - 1:54pm

Categorized: Bicycles, Downtown

Tagged: bike messengers dranking mad coffee

Jocelyn Superstar:

BIKE MESSENGERS STANDING BY AT ONE POST.
where it b at. you know. san francisco. 2001.

(link)

"Worst Brunch Ever"

Posted by Kevin Montgomery on Sun, 02/28/2010 - 12:08pm

Categorized: Haight

Tagged: I have a similar review of L.A.C. margaritas

Grace Zheng went to Kate's Kitchen and wasn't impressed:

HOLY SHIT SOMETHING OPENED!

Posted by Serg on Sat, 02/27/2010 - 9:05pm

Categorized: Eats and Beers, Tenderloin / Civic Center

Tagged: FOOD!

I haven't eaten here but I was fucking shocked to see the grand opening banner announcing the arrival of a Yemenis restaurant at the culinary mecca that is Post and Larkin. Ever since I first noticed this building in 2003 this place has been empty with some shitty ass microsoft word flyers taped to the window that proclaiming "Jenny's International Cuisine Coming SOON!" in all the arched glory that the janky impact font could muster up. I'm kind of disappointed that Jenny's amazing international cuisine never got to make it's mark on the culinary scene of San Francisco but this place might be good. Yelp hasn't hit it, they've probably been to busy stuffing their dumb fucking faces with Carne Asada fries at Olivos, apparently worthless fucking SoCal bastadized white people taqueria garbage plates are the holy grail of mexican food on yelp (their pupusas are no joke tho, I fuck with them hard and they are super nice).

I Guess They Ran Out of Cocaine at Delirium Last Night

Posted by Kevin Montgomery on Sat, 02/27/2010 - 1:19pm

Categorized: Fashion

Hood Rat rides the Muni so you don't have to:

You’re standing on the 14, it’s like 3am. You see a dude passed the fuck out.
You laugh and take a picture, HA HA. Only problem is about 10 mins later you realize you haven’t had a good nights sleep in like 2 weeks/months/years… Then you look at the time and realize when you decided to post this picture…
FML