Religion is a helluva drug

Impersonator Misses Hunky Jesus Contest by 143 Days

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Uptown reader “ALWAYS HIGH” (shrug) sent along this snap of Jesus carrying a cross down Mission Street, noting “I found Jesus today.”

We can only assume that either (1) this man is unfortunately very late for Dolores Park's Hunky Jesus Contest or (2) he's being nailed up somewhere between Thrift Town and the methy Walgreens.

Shirtless Crazyperson Yelling Atop Buddhist Temple's Front Gate Shuts Down 17th

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Erika tells us that 17th from Mission to Valencia is completely shut down because a nutter is making a scene and “yelling uncontrollably.”  Not only that, but there's four cop cars, an ambulance, a firetruck, and an army of gawkers helping make this a bona fide spectacle:

This, people, is why you should never read spiritual texts without a sober chaperon.