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Hot Jam For The Rapture: Kreayshawn's "Gucci Gucci"

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

When someone sends me an email that starts out with “Chick rapper out of Oakland. Fresh.” and I see a pair of tattooed white girls with thick glasses and feather earrings, I start retching.  But damn, this shit is definitely fresh.  Just check out some of the lyrics:

Yeah you can kiss the ring but you could never touch the crown
I smoke a million swisher blunts and I ain't never coming down
Bitch you ain't no Barbie, I see you work at Arby's
Number 2, supersize, hurry up I'm starving

And

The editor, director, plus I'm my own boss, 
so posh nails fierce with the gold gloss
Which means, nobody's getting over me
I got the swag and it's puffin out my ovaries

I, for one, am glam I got to experience this song before End Times.

Fellow UA contributor Josh Constine also notes:

Unlike most of today's rap lyrics, “Gucci Gucci” discusses Bay Area staples that didn't exist in the G-Funk era. With name checks of Twitter, Google, and Adderall (you know, so kids can study hard, get into one of those elite universities, and score a job at these tech companies), Kreayshawn reformats hip hop cliches about drugs and success. The jam is clearly for a modern audience that are more likely to be in the age range of Eazy-E's illegitimate children than his fans.

Full lyrics at the top of the comments, because yer deaf.

Hey it's Jam Hands!

— By Laura B |

If you're not familiar with Jam Hands, she's a ukelele playing maniac who lives in the Tenderloin, where she walks her dog and writes awesome music. Her songs are mean and funny and they just keep getting better and better. Here she is singing Modest Geologist, which is a personal favorite and during which she rhymes undies with Kelly Bundy and Delta Burke lingere with punk rock ways WHAT and YES:

Also, Never Have Sex with Yr Boss! So good. And FOR REAL. Anyway, you can see her perform as part of Bitchez Brew Rusts in a Truck (I didn't make up the name, okay?) at 9 p.m. on Friday, February 25th, at Kaleidoscope Free Speech Zone. I'll be there with my jam hands t-shirt and my jam hands baseball cap. That's how you'll know it's me.

p.s. an aside: you've all seen the Weekend at Bernies dance craze, right? I know it's hella old but: AMAZING.