I realize the N Judah is quite possibly the most infuriating, crowded, slow, and self-medication demanding form of public transportation in the world, but there is absolutely no excuse for not knowing how to hold an iPhone while shooting video.

To assist us in this simple “How to hold and iPhone while recording video” tutorial, I've enlisted our 4 o'clock hour college dorm-room buddy, SpongeBob:

In the first photo, SpongeBob is hanging out in Dolores Park amongst the endless fields of flowers and skies of butterflies we've come to enjoy on a daily basis.  Unfortunately, SpongeBob has downed a 40 of Olde English and smoked half a bag of grass, so he is shooting video vertically.  SpongeBob should be shot.

In the second photo, SpongeBob is 'shredding mad trail' on his mountain bike.  Of course, he's riding no handed so he can record some sick youtubes of his adventure.  SpongeBob should win an Oscar.

Folks, crackheads will always be crackheads, but we San Franciscans can come together to teach people how to properly hold their iPhones.