Laughing is a way better drug than whatever you're railing.
The San Francisco comedy scene is small and tight. A couple of times a year it expands, welcoming some special guests [obvious vagina references removed by editor.] Kicked off on the 13th, the month long San Francisco Sketchfest is happening right now. It is a golden opportunity to go laugh at something other than your drunken friends' failed triple piggy back ride.
You can checkout the full schedule right here, but a couple of shows that I can recommend:
1/17 - 10 Year Reunion Show w/ Kasper Hauser
1/19 - Kasper Hauser: Time Machine
1/20-1/23 - Mike Birbiglia
1/20 - RiffTrax Presents Night of the Shorts
1/21 - WTF with Marc Maron
1/22 - The Sound of Young America Live
1/29 - Whose Live Anyway (for those of you who like safe comedy)
Sketch comedy isn't just for personal enjoyment, either. It provides a service to the community. For example, The Midnight Show out of LA has a practical solution for your pet related fears:
So, stop being boring and go see some live comedy. It's festivals like these that make SF feel like a big boy city. Your $1 PBRs will still be at the bar when you're done.