I had a conversation with my roommate. 

 

Me: Hey man, are you like, by any chance, peeing in my face wash?

Him: What was that?

M: Oh nothing, nevermind.

H: Did you ask if I was peeing in your face wash?

M: Yeah, I mean, it’s orange naturally, but lately it’s been really watery and yellowish.

H: Ha! That’s great, yeah I totally have been, it took you like a month to notice.

M: Oh, neat. Yeah I’ve been meaning to start peeing in yours.

H: Really? No way, that’s not cool, don’t do that.

M: Well, how about I’ll just start peeing in mine and you can just go and pee in yours, it’s like the same thing.

H: Yeah, but if you don’t pee in yours then I’m ruining my own face wash!

M: Yes that’s kind of the point, anyway, I hate you.

 

 

Okay, this conversation has never happened, but it’s been going through my mind all day, you know, ever since I found my watery, yellow face wash.

 

(Crossing my fingers it just filled with water.)

 

(No, yeah, man, I totally understand you’re busy later and can’t hang out. Maybe next wee— Oh you’re busy next week too? How about I call you someti— You don’t want me to call you? Is this because I use pee face wash? Yeah? Oh. Okay that’s cool. See you around, I guess.)