I was at Dolores Park yesterday morning and it was fun and all but, you know, it was a mudpit.  So I said to my friends “I wanna go home and listen to ‘Root Down’ ” and we hit the pavement.  Anyways, my sex life is such that I didn’t have anything better to do on a Sunday afternoon and my masculinity is… well, let’s just say that I still thought Brett Favre played for Green Bay.  So I squandered my day to watching videos of Dolores Park on YouTube.  Here’s the highlights:

This video was ridiculous.  Lucciano Pizzichini had just turned 8 years old and did an entire performance in the park with a tip jar and some business cards.  At 4:30, you can see how massive the crowd was.  Best of all, the movie starts off with a classic shot of a crazy-burner doing a awkward “only a white person could do this” dance.  Best of all, when this kid is famous, you can say “Oh yeah, I saw him on YouTube way back in 2010.  Hella badass.

There were several shots of this performance.  While this particular video was not quite as good, I sort of loved the fact there was a cool kid eye-raping an 8-year-old atop of a fixie.

This video isn’t necessarily that interesting, but I appreciated the fact that they called it “Dolore Park” and they published a picture of a girl taking an bong rip before driving.  Smooth.  I wonder what her mom’s vagina is called.

Live action role playing isn’t my thing but I’m generally a fan of unscripted violence so I’ll let it pass.

With the great iPhone backlash of 2010 and glorification of ‘dated technology’, this was the logical next step.

DOGS IN HD!

How to go sledding in Dolores Park.  What’s everyone doing tomorrow night?