I don't think before I type's Posts

My favorite day in Dolores Park, ever. Went down dressed as Zombie Cold Beer! Cold Water!. For those of you not from San Francisco, “Cold Beer! Cold Water!” is a man who walks around Dolores Park with a cooler bag selling, well, yeah…. cans of PBR (sometimes Simple Times) and water. Here are some photos of him. And while he’s not wearing this outfit in any of those shots, I promise this is pretty damn close to what he wore most days this summer.

I can do a pretty good impression of his call, and he kind of sounds like a zombie anyway, so I went with it. I had my zombie walk on, and set out hollering… over and over and over… “Cold beer! Cold Water!” Some people had no idea what was going on, but most people recognized who I was supposed to be. And THREE different people mistook me for the man himself, all saying something like, “Oh, my god! He dressed up for Halloween!” One man was convinced I stole CBCW’s shirt. Ganja Treats took my photo! I sold twelve beers and four waters (though I gave away like half of them). But where was the OG CBCW?

I got up to leave after a couple hours, carrying my cooler, continuing the zombie walk and yelling his call, when suddenly, I heard him. He was only fifty feet or so away from me. “Cold Beer!” he yelled. “Cold Water!” I responded. People were cracking up, and one woman came running after me demanding I go after him and take a photo. I was on my way out though and having never talked to dude in my life didn’t know if he’d really appreciate my costume and I chickened out. Still, I had a blast.
Photos by Erin Steach.
Previously on Uptown Almanac
Simon Christen shot the above, amazing time-lapse shots of San Francisco and the Bay Area. According to PetaPixel, he shot using all manual settings on his Canon 40D changing them to adjust for light. Dude has patience. I watched this with no sound so hopefully there's not some shitty new age music playing over it. I'm guessing it uses Rappin 4 Tay.
Previously on Uptown Almanac
Apparently, Lefty O'Doul, which I found out was merely a mannequin and not a taxidermied version of the man himself, had his left arm stolen a few years back and was taken on a whirlwind tour of the globe, as reported by NPR. Not bad, not bad, but I'd like to see someone do this with one of the Doggy Diner heads.
I showed up, spurred on more by the rumors of free alcohol than by any interest in seeing the reattachment of the arm by an actual doctor (paid for by Obamacare). I shot this and it features at least one world famous blogger, Beth Spotswood, who blogged about me blogging about her and here I am blogging about that like an even shittier version of Inception. Here's a bonus video I shot of Stevie Nicks talking to the doctor:

Support brutal dictatorships in South America, Africa, and Southeast Asia? Create homelessness at the astonishing levels we see today? Triple the deficit? Ignore the AIDS epidemic?
Spotted somewhere around 3rd and Brannan.
Well, except for Evelyn Taft obviously, and Gary Radnich, but everything else makes me sad. At least this guy has a tripod. I've seen other KRON reporters just put the camera all crooked up on a garbage can.
Video for Zach Hill's (Hella) "The Sacto Smile". I think I need a girl like this in my life. Actually, come to think of it, I guess I've had girls like this in my life. Good times.
Previously on Uptown Almanac

Some punk kid put together a detailed proposal for an Oakland streetcar plan for $987, or the same amount the writers of Uptown Almanac spent on alcohol, vegan cookies, and condoms last weekend. I read about it awhile back, but it seems to be gaining momentum with said punk kid, 20-year-old Stanford student Daniel Jacobson, presenting at the Oakland Bicycle and Pedestrian Advisory Committee tonight. These types of proposals usually, inexplicably cost a few hundred grand to put together, so I propose capping city planner ages at 21, when idealism and naivety allow people to create things without wasting a shitload of money. Read more at Oakland North.
What with their new future-bridge logo, the possibility of Larry Ellison buying the team, and the above information from the obviously hilarious Warriors beat writer Marcus Thompson it seems to leave little doubt that King James will be announcing his signing with Golden State tomorrow night. I know I shouldn't be posting about sports on San Francisco's number one rated hipster blog, but seeing as I almost got beat up by one of the Uptown writers for talking smack about the Red Sox last week, I figure it's okay.
Apparently everyone on earth has already seen this, but I was celebrating my purchase of some non-iPhone fancypants phone on the internets and Stefania Starfish linked to this. I'm getting that HTC EVO. I don't know anything about it, but I heard I can play Tetris on it, so that's all I need really. I can do that on the Razr that I've had for five years also, but that Tetris is too easy.

It's not often that I get excited about a show in Daly City (well, there is that epic Slayer, Megadeth, Testament show at the Cow Palace in August), but check this out: Thee Oh Sees, Sic Alps, Fresh & Onlys join headliners Eddy Current Suppression Ring this Saturday at Serra Bowl. For FREE! All ages and whatnot too. Plus bowling. And judging by the map I just looked at, it seems highly Bartable. Put together by the fine folks at The Bay Bridged. I will be there and will challenge anyone of you to a game of bowling as long as you promise not to crack 100.

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