gross
Normally I wouldn't let this blog do such a promotion, but Big River Man (Epic River Man?) is a fat alcoholic that likes to do epic adventures (read: me in 25 years). Given that I love alcohol and windows into my future, I'd like to let you know that Big River Man is playing at The Roxie for a few weeks, starting May 28th at 7pm.
Do you want free tickets? Tell us your best swimming (or water-related) story in the comments and the best story wins them.
(In the event no stories are told, the first comment will win them. If no one comments, it will prove what I always suspected: no one reads this thing. Am I talking to myself again?)
I had a conversation with my roommate.
Me: Hey man, are you like, by any chance, peeing in my face wash?
Him: What was that?
M: Oh nothing, nevermind.
H: Did you ask if I was peeing in your face wash?
M: Yeah, I mean, it's orange naturally, but lately it's been really watery and yellowish.
H: Ha! That's great, yeah I totally have been, it took you like a month to notice.
M: Oh, neat. Yeah I've been meaning to start peeing in yours.
H: Really? No way, that's not cool, don't do that.
M: Well, how about I'll just start peeing in mine and you can just go and pee in yours, it's like the same thing.
H: Yeah, but if you don't pee in yours then I'm ruining my own face wash!
M: Yes that's kind of the point, anyway, I hate you.
Okay, this conversation has never happened, but it's been going through my mind all day, you know, ever since I found my watery, yellow face wash.
(Crossing my fingers it just filled with water.)
(No, yeah, man, I totally understand you're busy later and can't hang out. Maybe next wee-- Oh you're busy next week too? How about I call you someti-- You don't want me to call you? Is this because I use pee face wash? Yeah? Oh. Okay that's cool. See you around, I guess.)
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