The Mission for Yuppies

An anonymous reader sent us this map:

Check out the map a yuppie friend drew to explain the Mission to out-of-towners. He characterized my street as “less scary”. Fuck that shit.

We agree.  FUCK THAT SHIT.  We made your friend a better map for yuppies:

There, that's everything white out-of-towners need to know.  Tell your friend he can mail his check for $75 to 300 Beale St., Suite #100, SF 94105

Comments (12)

Effing hilarious

You missed a chance to stick in a pile of used hypos somewhere near the central freeway.

AWESOME. no coke baggies at pop’s or deliriscum though?

I think this map needs to be blown up and done in even more detail. then we can sell prints; FUCK YEAH UPTOWN MERCH!

Both are hilarious. Nice one, bruv.

Clearly, the yuppie who made the first map has never been to the Lower Haight. “Pretty nice”? I’m not a yuppie and I ain’t scared of it, but I don’t feel a lot of yuppie love at say, Molotovs on Haight.

If you make a print version, please make it scratch-n-sniff. Urine, bacon hot dog, etc.

needs more urine @ 16th and mission, otherwise it’s excellent.

Love the hippies on top of Rainbow Grocery

You should move to the Marina so I can have my neighborhood back.

Ya gotta include poop and condoms around the fire station on 19th & Folsom.. However if you wish to combine the two items, it should be placed over at 20th and Treat instead.