— By Alan Fineberg |
There's a new Apple Store in town and it's not an Apple Store at all; it's a Thai Restaurant:
Welcome to a post-Steve Jobs world, in which everything is either prefixed with 'i' or exploits underpaid Asian workers or BOTH.
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Internet law requires us to post everything cat-related we come across, and this is most definitely vaguely cat-related. So here you are.
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Jeff Cleary spotted this wonderfully rich, the-gentrification-jokes-practically-write-themselves tag on 16th and Guerrero, noting “at least it's a step up from pussyjuice.”
Wait, what? We're down on pussyjuice now?
[Thanks Jeff! Get a job!]
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Mission Local brings us the good news:
There’s no opening date just yet, but strikes are in the Mission Bowling Club’s [17th and South Van Ness] near future.
Apart from some finishing touches, the staff of 50 has been hired and trained.
Everyone is now just waiting to hear that the venue has passed the last inspections before they open the doors to the neighborhood’s first bowling alley.
Hurrah!
And what is the operation going to look like?
[Anthony Myint, whose operating the kitchen] sees this area of the Mission as a new micro-hood, and thinks someone should come up with a name for it. A few blocks away, new businesses have recently opened, including Southern Pacific Brewery, and Flour + Water’s market is scheduled to open soon.
The bowling alley’s menu will include the popular Mission Burger, as well as bar snacks such as homemade beef jerky and food on sticks.Happy hour will be from 3 to 6 p.m., and dinner service from 6 to 11 p.m. on weekdays. On Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights, the alley will close at midnight. Prices will range from $35 to $55 per lane per hour.
Don't worry, Anthony, I'm sure the Bold Italic is already on the case.
(Also, !!!!!)
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Hey Bernal! Yeah you, I see you there. Look man, we gotta talk.
You're cool and all, with those breathtaking views of San Francisco n' shit. But you've been playing the same tune for thousands of years and people don't wanna hear that no more. Yeah man, I'm talking about your grass situation. The pants stainer. The original weed. The green menace. Whatever you wanna call it, 'shit's played out—business as usual.
But, dude, check it: I got the fix for you. Art-a-ficial grah-ass. You heard of this stuff? No? Oh dude, it's the fucking shit. We take your old, crabby-ass grass, dump it in some abandoned lot in Bayview, and then we cover your ass in plastic. Plastic! It's modern, man—real cutting-edge shit. All the kids are playing soccer on it, it stays green year-round, and I heard it drains real well because, you know, sometimes rains in San Francisco.
Dude, think about it, if we level out some of those hideous deformities of yours, kids could be playing soccer on you. Soccer, Bernie, soccer! Have you seen some of the soccer moms around here? Yeah yeah, those mega-babes could be standing on you buddy, and just think about your vantage point… Heh heh heh, yaaa now you're feeling me.
I know you're looking at the price tag and, yeah, this shit ain't cheap. But looking good was never cheap. This isn't some thrift store garbage, no man, this is fresh off the runway. You'll be the envy of every other broke-ass park in town. You'll be cruising the streets in a Range while they're stuck trying to find parking for their penny-farthings. “Move over, Twin Peaks! Bernal's king of this town!”
Did I mention the babes?
So, dude, why not show off your million dollar view with millions of dollars in turf renovations? They'll be looking at you, they'll be talking about you, they'll want to be you.
Plus, Golden Retrievers just love the shit.
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
We've already posted about this story twice this week, so we're going to keep this short. But after being contacted by an “East Bay cafe owner looking to expand into San Francisco,” commercial realtor Tracy Chiao spilled the beans that 780 Valencia Street (formerly occupied by The Summit) is most definitely for rent, and at a price far beyond what any local business could ever possibly afford:
Subject: 780 Valencia
Attached is the flyer for the building. We are looking at $30k / month NNN in rent plus $2,300 / month in estimated NNN expenses. Please let me know if you have any questions!
Best,
Tracy C Chiao
Retail Leasing Specialist
And here's the building flyer:
Since our last post on the La Boulange story, a spokesman for the La Boulange told us the only reason they didn't move into 780 Valencia was because “the space was too big.” We have since learned that SoCal burger chain Umami Burger is eying the location for their continued NorCal expansion.
We're still waiting to i/o Ventures to return to our phone calls, but it appears what they've been saying to the press thus far has been completely dishonest.
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Following up on the rumors we posted about Wednesday alleging that Bay Area bakery chain La Boulange was slated to move into the i/o Ventures space formerly occupied by The Summit, both i/o and La Boulange have issued responses denying the bakery is slated to move into 780 Valencia.
i/o Ventures partner Ashwin Navin responded to a press inquiry from Mission Local, denying the story outright and reaffirming that Jose Ramos is scheduled to open up 780 Cafe this week:
“As long as we’re in the building,” Navin said, “we’ll always try to give the start-up entrepreneur a chance, and right now we’re happy to see Jose Ramos take the torch. Let’s show him the love and support he has offered the whole community in the Mission over the last 10-plus years.
“Jose Ramos and his family subleased the space from the Summit and will operate under the exact same rental figures, which are below what other businesses pay their landlords on Valencia Street. If Jose can keep his payroll and operating costs under control, we are confident he can turn a profit.”
However, La Boulange's owner Pascal Rigo statement to Uptown reveals that La Boulange, in fact, looked into moving into The Summit, suggesting that Navin's statement that i/o is “always [trying] to give the start-up entrepreneur a chance” was disingenuous:
We are very focused on serving and giving back to our communities and the neighborhoods we operate in. We did look at the space last year, but we were not interested in moving forward with it. We really appreciate the energy and the diversity of the Mission and we receive a lot of requests from La Boulange customers to open one of our bakery/cafés in this part of the city. We would love to do it if the right opportunity arises.
Ashwin's statement on Jose “keeping payroll” and “[turning] a profit” is also consistent with the rumors we've heard that Jose—who has no formal business experience—and 780 Cafe is being propped up to fail so i/o can assert that local businesses were unable to make the space profitable and they need a corporate entity to come in turn it around.
Another interesting statement from Ashwin was “as long as we're in the building, we'll always try to give the start-up entrepreneur a chance.” Perhaps, given the rumored financial instability of i/o, they're looking to sell the space? Given the real estate boom along the Valencia corridor, i/o could sell their building and easily turn a profit.
[Note: i/o Ventures and Ashwin Navin have both so far declined to respond our inquiries thus far]
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Looks like they never finished filling in the “tree.” The SEC must've caught 'em.
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Our buddy, who was close to the deal, brings us word that beloved Potrero Ave dive Mission Hill Saloon has been purchased by Jay and Oliver of Dear Mom:
Bad news, or good news… I'm having a hard time deciding. The Saloon changed hands today. It'll be closed on Monday for remodeling. The buyers? Jay and Oliver of Dear Mom.
Mike, the previous owner of The Saloon, took a greater share of (silent) ownership of all Thieves bars in return. Now we can all celebrate (or mourn) the arrival of another official Thieves bar.
When I followed up for more details on the new bar, this is all I got back:
They're going to change much of the decor from what I gather. Redoing the bar and hopefully the bathrooms. Many of the bartenders will likely lose their jobs… Jay and Oliver will run it. I imagine it will be more like Dirty Thieves than Dear Mom.
Also, there's going to be a party Sunday night for anyone who loved it. I'm truly sad about the change of ownership. The Saloon was a true dive bar… it's gonna change forever.
Don't get me wrong, it's not hard for me to get behind an outing to Dear Mom. But Mission Hill Saloon was one of the better dives in the hood: the drinks were cheap, the bartenders were awesome, the bathroom wall art was some of the best in town, the pool table was often free, annoying people generally didn't walk in the door, and it was one of the few places left where the bartenders would get so trashed that the customers had to take care of them. It had real character (not to say Dear Mom doesn't, but it's undeniably different); one I can't imagine will remain.
(Oh, and let's hope pray they don't stop selling Keystone)
UPDATE: It's facebook-official.
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
UPDATE: We've posted a follow-up to this story, with responses from i/o Ventures and La Boulange.
We've been hearing a lot of rumors lately about the location formerly occupied by The Summit on Valencia at 19th. A couple weeks ago, “Chicken” John Rinaldi dropped us a note telling us that a realtor friend of his had learned that Bay Area bakery chain La Boulange was slated to move into The Summit early this Summer. Of course, Chicken John has a, ahem, “controversial” reputation around these sorts of matters, so we weren't sure what to make of it.
But then on Feb. 2nd, Mission Local published a story about 780 Cafe replacing The Summit, once again repeating the rumor that La Boulange was supposed to move in, giving the rumor another dose of credibility.
Finally, a board member of the Valencia Corridor Merchants Association recently told us that the organization is holding an “emergency meeting” on March 5th to discuss La Boulange, “'formula retail' moving into The Summit,” and the fact that the rent on that space is being raised to $30,000/month.
If all this sounds highly questionable, it's because it is. SF's Dept. of Building Inspection's database shows that no building permits have been filed at 780 Valencia St. in 11 months—and neither i/o Ventures (the owner of the building) nor La Boulange have returned our phone calls or emails. But when three individuals and organizations repeat the same rumor, it gives us pause.
What we have managed to learn makes the situation sound very sketchy. We're told that i/o Ventures ran into some “financial trouble” and responded by doubling monthly rent for The Summit and the desks rented to start-ups and freelancers; the monthly cost of a desk rose to $500, while The Summit’s rent was increased to an unbelievable 30 grand. Allegedly the only businesses interested in paying that much for a Valencia Street coffee shop was Starbucks and La Boulange. i/o Ventures ended up choosing La Boulange.
Under 2006's Proposition G, any retail business with 11 or more locations is classified as “formula retail” and subjected to a significantly more rigorous approval process—the same process that brought a proposed Valencia St. American Apparel to its knees in early 2009. La Boulange already operates 17 locations in the Bay Area, with 11 shops in San Francisco, and they plan to have 25 open by the end of the year. Owner Pascal Rigo even told the SF Business Times that he intends La Boulange to be a chain that is “too big.”
“We actually are trying to be ‘too big.’ People want us, and we are going to try to give it to them,” said Rigo, who founded Bay Bread in 1995. “I say, there are good chains and there are bad chains. We are going to be a good chain.”
This, of course, is not sitting well with Valencia business. They're concerned that if one chain moves onto Valencia and pays $30,000 a month in rent—an amount no small entrepreneur can pay, but a bakery with $60-90 million in revenue can—landlords will refuse to renew the leases of local businesses hoping to hike up the rent. This lease to La Boulange could set a dangerous precedent that would jeopardize the futures of many Valencia merchants.
And then there's that Mission Local article about 780 Cafe opening up, which is shaping up to be an even sadder story. We're told the owner, Jose, is being given use of the space rent-free for the months until La Boulange moves in, just to help keep the place afloat. Then he’s being kicked out, despite fronting money for permits and having his entire family quit their jobs to help run the cafe.
As we said, we're maintaining this is all speculation until someone can give us a definitive answer on this (and we're encouraging anyone who can provide us with more info to drop us a note). But, rest assured, Valencia merchants and activists are already gearing up for a fight.