Bernal

SUNDAY: Local Bands, BBQ, and Bottomless PBR for $10

Cristina writes in to tell us about an AIDS Lifecycle fundraiser going down this Sunday at 3pm in Bernal Heights:

There's a kick-ass show happening this Sunday, May 1st at the Wild Side West in Bernal Heights. It's a benefit show for three riders in the AIDS Lifecycle. The P's & Q's, The Heated and Tik-Tik Fly (a duo, one of whom tap dances!) will be performing. There will be bottomless PBR for a 10$ donation, delicious BBQ and a raffle with a chance to win many rad prizes (like a Get Awesome tote bag printed by The Heated, or a bicycle tie from This Humble Abode).

Bottomless PBR?  What the what?  That sounds like a perfect, if not miserable, conclusion to a morning of bottomless mimosas at brunch.  Thanks for the heads up!

Local News Catches On To "La Lengua"

Ever since Google Maps added “La Lengua” to their map, the old folk's media has been giving the 'new microhood' a lot of press.  The coverage reached a fever pitch yesterday when CBS 5 sent a fashionable reporter to the corner of Mission and Valencia to tell Latino's that they were in “La Lengua,” make a bunch of tongue puns, and to eat a tongue burrito at the popular “Taqueria Can-Can.”  Give it a watch.

Willie Brown: Mission St. Needs to "Get Together and Figure Out How to Offer Valet Parking"

Amazingly, this is not an April Fool's joke. From Willie's latest Inside Scoop column:

I wandered out for another birthday dinner to a place called the Blue Plate out on Mission where you should eat in your car because there’s no parking. All those restaurants are going to suffer if they don’t get together and figure out how to offer valet parking. They’re so close together they should collectively take one of those lots in night and have parking. I think they’re missing lots of opportunities for other San Franciscans to experience what they cook out there because the challenge to find the parking space dissuades people from going out.

Willie, I know I'm out of touch because I didn't make a grip of cash selling out San Francisco to developers, but since when do whores eat anything other than other people's genitals while parked along Mission?  Don't get me wrong, I'd be all for a drive-up diner, complete with roller-skating waitress, milk shakes, onion rings, and bike parking, opening up along Mission, but don't you think that there are better solutions to the problem than eating inside your car or paying some bro minimum wage to figure out the parking 'crisis' for you?  Like, I don't know, taking the bus?

Then you'd really have something to complain about.

Bummer: Maggie Mudd to Close

Since people seem to really like their ice cream, we regret to bring everyone news of the closing of Cortland Ave's Maggie Mudd, maker of delicious dairy-full and dairy-free ice cream, seller of cones wrapped in the American flag, and purveyor of some of the best damn sundaes in the city.  The silver lining is they don't plan on shutting their doors until April 3rd, so you have a week of warm weather to stuff your face with waffle sundaes until MM transitions the business to online-only cake outfit.

Maggie Mudd's owner explained his reasoning for shutting down to Vegansaurus!:

Since MM won’t be entirely going away, there’s a chance it’ll appear on the street again somewhere. The currently location is really not the best, since it’s so far away from one of its core audiences.

Damn, one of my favorite things about Maggie Mudd was the fact it was far enough away that I didn't eat there daily.  Then again, I suppose that's the problem with their location.  Anyway, sorry to see you go, MM.  We'll never forget not being able to walk after downing a Messy Marcy.

[Vegansaurus! | Photo by Juicyrai]

Anti-Choice Protesters Setup Shop Outside Valencia's New Planned Parenthood

That didn't take long.  The City's only Planned Parenthood at Valencia and Mission has been open for less than two months and it's already seeing protestors outside holding signs and praying at passersby, which means my walk to Bernal's Safeway just became a whole lot more interesting.  Brady Lea, who recorded some video on the 5-person protest, noted:

I asked if they knew what Planned Parenthood did, and they prayed at me. I asked if they knew about the exams, testing and women's healthcare they provided as well as all sorts of family planning education and they prayed some more. Then it started raining harder and I guess they left.

[link - Edit: Bernalwood also covered this]

City of San Francisco Upset About a 70-Year-Old Billboard

I don't know if everyone has been following the epic NIMBY battle going on in Bernal Heights over the historic Coca Cola billboard, but it's good stuff.  To recap: a lone hater neighbor complained to the city that this 'corporate billboard' violated the city's strict laws against billboards, the city agreed and demanded the owner of the building paint over it.  After some neighborhood outrage, the city backtracked and said if the owner of the building could prove that the billboard was put up prior to 1965, it could stay as it would be deemed “historic” and would be grandfathered into the pool of legal billboards.  Some sleuthing by Bernalwood and Burrito Justice proved that the mural, which has been maintained by the building owner since 1991 (hence looking fresh), was originally painted in the late 1930's or early 40s.

Crisis adverted, right? Nope.  After proving the billboard met the city's requirement, the city's sign expert told the Chronicle, “But the law is totally nondiscretionary. This is a residential district and an unpermitted general advertising sign.”  Really?  What about that whole 1965 nonsense?  Basically, the city was just “lol jk!” about that and will require it be either painted over or that Supervisor David Campos introduce legislation to make a “special sign district,” legislation that would have to be “reviewed by the Planning Commission, the board's Land Use Committee, the Board of Supervisors and, quite possibly, the Historic Preservation Commission.”  Seems like a whole lot of bullshit for a harmless sign that has been visible for decades….

The Chronicle called up Supervisor Campos to see what he thought:

Campos is still mulling the issue.

We haven’t really taken a position either way,” Campos said. “We want to hear more from the neighborhood.”

He said he’s already received a handful of passionate e-mails from both sides.

We’re trying to fight childhood obesity,” he said. “We don’t want to promote kids drinking Coca-Cola.”

Sigh.

(Read more about the drama at Bernalwoodphoto by Troy Holden)

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