— By Alan Fineberg |
This is weird. I was taking a break from refilling my various whipped cream dispensers (I like to bake) to causally play a game of Ouija by myself and I heard a clinking in the other room.
All the cansisters had fallen to the floor and were arranged in an odd manner. Wonder what this means
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
And mis-use of dash is da cool-est.
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
In a sharp, Four Loko-y departure from the PBR era of hipster culture, alt SOMA venue DNA Lounge has introduced a disgusting new cocktail aimed at stroking the whimsy of seapunks. And how fortunate for us! While the past few months in San Francisco has seen everything from murals to fashion to daywalkers from which to draw everyday inspiration, no one has really told us how to drink like a seapunk.
So, how does it taste?
Doctor Popular assured me that it tasted a lot like seawater so I guess he was feeling the waves.
If by “waves” you mean nausea, because this shit literally sounds like bile.
Anyway, anyone have eight bucks I can borrow?
[via Pixelhaunt]
— By Serg |
SF Lowrider documentary that you can watch on IMDB (don't ask me why they don't allow embedding so just click the image, it's only like 25 minutes long anyways nevermind found it on youtube). A bunch of footage from the 70's and 80's about what car culture in this city use to be like. Something this town has traded for bullshit like standing in lines for mediocre brunch and soggy cups of dirty water and liquor that taste like old trees. Car Culture in the bay is shitty in general, stuck hanging on the fringe. Do kids even get drivers licenses in this town before they are 30? Even if it's some dumb shit like wings on a front wheel drive, primered out everything, rattling plates, or even rainbow tint. It would be better than nothing. Whatever, it's not like I'm copping triple gold d's anytime soon either but I put in my time at lowrider shows. Yes I was in a lowrider bike club, spent years collecting issues of all kinds of mags, sported atzlan tshirts and all that. Even when I was driving around in a crx with a b18 I still had a soft spot in my heart for a dumped caprice with 4 15's in the trunk.
Parts 2 & 3:
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Could it be now that the face of one of the Mission's biggest wheel thieves is all busted up, the folks at Freewheel Bike Shop are slashing prices in anticipation of a sharp decline in demand for the hottest, easily-removable fixie components? Or, perhaps more likely, is no one these days buying glamorous rims that had a two month long ordering backlog just a couple of years ago?
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
The sun is really setting on what once looked to be a really promising career as a drug dealing Lady Gaga. In the span of 9 months, Kreayshawn has gone from Oakland to international celebrity to doing banner ads for thrift stores online. She's basically the hipster Mr. T, only her rise and fall got condensed down to satisfy the attention span of the internet.
[Tumblr]
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Benny Gold, the local skate fashion designer whose “Stay Gold” logo you've most definitely seen if you've ever been outside your house, has made a bold venture into the gourmet body care business! That's right, for $8 a bar, you can smell like your favorite bike messenger. Or at least someone who bathes.
From a press release a couple of weeks back:
This Friday, for the first time we are venturing into the world of natural body care. Our all natural bar of soap is shaped like our iconic paper plane and available in Bulgarian Lavender, Peppermint or Lemon Verbena.
The soap is formulated with natural botanicals and essential oils. There is nothing artificial about this soap – It’s vegan and paraben-free with no artificial color or fragrance.
The packaging is made of 100% recyclable materials. It’s the perfect way to stay golden fresh!
You can score some at his 16th and Guerrero shop, or order some online.
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
The other day I witnessed what could possibly be the best real life adaptation of Blue Velvet ever accidentally performed:
Counter Guy: Sorry James, we don't sell singles of Heineken, only Corona.
Cold Beer, Cold Water: Well too bad, I need a Heineken for a customer.
CG: Okay, five bucks.
CBCW: Five bucks?! Come on man…
CG: Why don't you just buy the six pack and sell the rest?
CBCW: Are you kidding me?! No one in the park wants to drink a fucking Heineken.
After another minute of arguing and watching the counter guy trying to put the Heineken back in the cooler, James ended up paying the $5 demanded for the single bottle. That's what I call service.
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |
Man, writing for a 'real' newspaper must be a total bummer. When Mission bloggers have nothing to write about, we just scour Tumblr for a sweet graffiti pic, come up with a killer pun and start drinking. But when the poor fucks who write for the Wall Street Journal have no news to report, they're forced to scribble some 'trend piece' about where people with disposable incomes and a fancying for $9 appetizers hang out.
Awful, just awful stuff.
But, it seems some people—namely realtors and landlords, although I suppose they are people too—do take this stuff seriously. So join me in acknowledging the Wall Street Journal's acknowledgment that NOPA/Divis/Western Addition is “San Francisco's new Mission District”:
The Divisadero Corridor, which runs roughly north and south between Haight and Turk streets and stretches a few blocks west and east of Divisadero Street in the Western Addition, has become San Francisco's new Mission District. Once a mainly black, working-class neighborhood, with some crack houses and prostitution, the Divisadero Corridor is becoming home to hip eateries and young, largely white techies. In doing so, the neighborhood is dealing with some of the same gentrification issues, such as rising rents and demographic shifts, that the Mission has faced in recent years. […]
The younger residents moving into the Divisadero Corridor are often coming after being priced out of the Mission District. Meghan Murray, a 28-year-old marketing employee for a technology start-up, says she and her boyfriend moved into a large studio near Alamo Square Park for $1,900 a month after failing to find one under their $2,000-a-month target in Mission. “It's sort of the same vibe here,” she says.
The same is true for business owners such as Brian Belier. The hairstylist wanted to open his salon, Population, in the Mission. But he found everything was too expensive and instead opted for a former check-cashing place on Divisadero and Fell streets, where the rent is less than half the $7,000-a-month going rate for a storefront he considered in the Mission. He says the clientele at his shop, which opened in August 2010, includes tech employees, students and artists.
And the money shot:
“People are thinking it's the Mission 2.0,” says Jarie Bolander, a board member and former president of the North Panhandle Neighborhood Association, which includes the Divisadero Corridor. “It's a great place to hang out and window shop.”
Don't get me wrong, I've got nothing but love for Divisadero. Just a few weeks back, I went to Fly Bar for the first time and chowed down on what might be the best happy hour menu I've ever seen in San Francisco. And Green Chili Kitchen, while technically not on Divisadero, cooks up one of the meanest breakfast burritos around. But this neighborhood v. neighborhood deal is getting kinda played out; never mind reeking of attention-seeking desperation.
Can we all just agree that the only two neighborhoods that should be compared are the Mission and the Marina, with the conclusion being the Mission is always better?
Anyway, time to start drinking.
