UPDATE: SFPD Now Doing Hourly Dirt Bike Patrols in Dolores Park, Leaving Two Officers Stationed Throughout the Day

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

The scene from 2 weeks ago.

As you may remember, nearly two weeks ago we reported that SFPD was renewing their campaign against fun with dirt bike cops rolling through Dolores Park on a chill Friday afternoon.  Well, it turns out that two weeks ago was only the beginning and the cops are now taking more drastic measures.  Starting at lunch today, reader Paul S. noted “cops are riding dirt bikes through the park. I want a moped to ride through their living rooms.”  He followed up saying that the cops were riding through the park “at least once an hour” and “going from group-to-group to see what they were up to.”

“What was remarkable about it was that in was a mellow Wednesday afternoon.  No one was even drinking heavily. […] The cops were riding in groups of two, one group on each side of the park.  After they were done bothering everybody, two of the cops would ride off and the other two would go to the top of the hill at the pedestrian bridge and just sit there watching everyone.  An hour later, the other two cops would come back and they would sweep the park again.”

While we're not an activist organization, rumors have it that NIMBYs are using the recent stabbing to pressure the parks department and SFPD into cracking down on weed, beer and cigarettes.  So far, they seem to be winning.  So feel free to contract these individuals if you want to let them know you do not support SFPD disturbing the peace and a couple of geezers trying to push their agenda on tens of thousands on San Franciscans:

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

THIS WEEKEND: PBR Pinball Tourney & Rock Make Street Fest.

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

#TEAM_UppyAlmy has been invited to participate in this invitation pinball tournament (FUNDING THE KEEP-A-BREAST FOUNDATION PEOPLE!), so naturally it is my privilege to invite you to come watch us suck at pinball.  PBR and REBEL8 are going to provide ping pong, pinball machines and some tacos for non-competitors, so it ought to be a good time. 

The event is open to the public, so I highly encourage inviting as many friends as possible, particularly for the purpose of cheerleading. We will also have 200 limited edition tees and posters by Mike Giant (who will also be doing a live piece), all for the ridiculously low price of $20, as well as the El Tonayense Taco Truck (I will provide some freebie tacos) and “refreshments”, so bring cash! I am not charging for the tournament, but would love if everybody  made a small donation to Keep A Breast.

…

TEAMS CONFIRMED: HUF, Benny Gold, FTC, Medicine Agency, Workshop, Bender’s, Fecal Face, Rebel8, 330 Ritch, Evergold/SFAQ, Self Edge, Bro Palace, 111 Minna, Indie Mart, #TEAM_UppyAlmy

As I mentioned, we’ll have the Taco Truck there, as well as ping pong and other games for the general public. Machines will also be open to public for free play after the tournament has wrapped up, so please encourage all your friends to come out.

I went to Rock Make last year and it was a pretty quality time (and free).  I was able to purchase a tshirt with a pigeon screen-printed on it, so that is a huge one up.

As you probably know The Bay Bridged is hosting our 3rd Annual Rock Make Street Festival THIS Sunday, August 22nd in the Mission District.  There will be 15 local and kids rock bands, 100 arts vendors, beer gardens, comedians, jumpy houses, animal demonstrations and more!

ANIMAL DEMONSTRATIONS PEOPLE.

Bear Fight

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

It's as douchey and disgusting as it looks.  And yes, it's daytime.

Admittedly, I've lost touch with New England culture over the past 3 years.  In general, I don't mind.  Bikes are more fun than public transportation.  Jorts are better than khakis.  Dolores Park beats Boston Common any day.  But whenever I get introduced to one of the latest Massachusetts memes, I'm always game to experiment.

Well, my buddy Jeff spent the summer out of the Mission and in the northeast working as a rafting guide.  Apparently, all the kids are getting into bear fights: an Irish Carbomb immediately followed by a Jagerbomb.  In spite of Jager's ironic comeback tour, this one made me a tad skeptical.  But after a hour and a half of what could be described as some of the most world-class peer pressuring I've ever witnessed, it was decided that a round would be ordered.  Much like a real bear fight, everyone not involved fled. The result?

This Super Mario Bros. Mural Might Be the Best Mural Ohio Has Ever Seen

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

Guys.  I don't really give a fuck this is thousands of miles away from San Francisco, this entire wall in Cuyahoga County, Ohio is pure brilliance.  I mean, just look at how rad it is:

Full-size

Full-size

The mural was put together by Gargantuen, whose website's graffiti section doesn't work too well, but whatever.  Boy's spraypaint skills clearly compensate.  CROW, and it features typo, ridle, resp, lost, and arise.

(See all the images on Gargantuen Graffiti's photostream)

Previously on Uptown Almanac: 

Treasure Island

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

There wasn't much of interest on the island to photograph, so here's a pic looking away from it.

Between not owning a car and having never had a reason to go to Treasure Island, it took me a whole three years to visit The Island.  I had always assumed Treasure Island would have something cool about it: maybe an off-the-radar bar, or tons of cool graffiti, or a sick BMX park so the flickrs could take rad photos of bros catching air with the Bay Bridge in the background.  Of course, my assumptions were crushed.  After spending approximately 45 minutes on the nearly-deserted Island, where the coolest thing you can do is buy Doritos at the packie that seems to close around sunset, there was a crippling urge to head back to the land of Leader frames and PBR.  Hitting the Bay Bridge, my buddy Kirt nailed it: “Who knew something so depressing could be so close to SF?  You must literally have the most depressing life living there.  Crap, I just spent a few minutes there and I can't wait to never go back.”

With that, I would like to congratulate the city of San Francisco for finally acquiring The Island.

Peace out, US Navy (via Octoferret)

Peace out, US Navy (via Octoferret)

Dolores Park Bike Swap Meat

— By Kevin Montgomery (@kevinmonty) |

The announcement of this bicycle commerce party deserves to be shared just because of their epic poster:

The Dolores Park swap loosely organized. 10am is the official start time, but some sellers may be setting up early. to sell, just show up with a blanket and some stuff to flip. to buy, bring cash monie$.You might want some PBR and sunglasses, since you are at DP.

The last one was set up on the main concrete walkway that leads to the bathrooms from 19th street and Dolores. but previous swaps were just on the grass. I’d say its likely to be on the concrete again?

(link.  via benjaminjtaylor)