What Mitt Romney Doesn't Want You To Know

That's right, boys and girls. This local genius has cracked the code. Romney is just “R MONEY” scrambled. R MONEY… don't you get it? Our Money? And he has disco skates… which unscrambles to … TACOS KISSED! Our Money is riding on TACOS KISSED? What does it mean!?

Somebody get Nicholas Cage on the phone. If my calculations are correct, this could answer the question of where all our fucking money has gone. It's riding around on tacos kissed. I can feel it.

Comments (2)

Was in line a few days ago to get overpriced ice cream at Humphrey Slocombe. This dude skated up with the word “SEX” written on his forehead in what appeared to be lipstick.

He was wearing a lab coat and clown glasses (and nothing else), and he had a mini-boombox attached to his waist.

Even stranger: I occasionally see him on the bus, where he appears to be a normal 9-5 office commuter.